Discovering the weird and whimsical sites of New England
Author: Theophanes Avery
Theophanes Avery is a whimsical travel blogger that is hopelessly in love with New England and all it's weird places, people, and things. Besides running way too many blogs they are the author of three books, at least one of them good, and they also enjoy raising aquarium fish in Walsted tanks, sculpting, Sharpie doodling, knitting, tattooing leather, homesteading, and whatever other hobby tickles their raging ADD. Less fortunately they are a hopelessly impoverished spoonie yelling to the world, "WE NEED MORE COMMUNITY!" but alas no one's listening. Make sure to find them on the FaceBook. They love new oddball friends. Fly the freak flag high my darlings!
As of late we’ve been riding around looking for sweet new breakfast spots to haunt and today was no different other than the fact we got a very late start and most places don’t serve breakfast in the afternoon. No matter! Google insisted this place did.
It’s weird, Narragansett isn’t far from my RI base in Newport and yet we hadn’t poked around there until today, specifically to find this little Mardi Gras/Southern themed plaza cafe. By now we’d just slipped in half an hour before closing. Most of the chairs were already on the tables. Still they were friendly and welcoming so we sat down.
The art hanging in this place was wild. A poster hung on the wall with several crayfish pinching towards the sky, reading above something about being boiled alive. The menu was no less eyebrow raising. Today’s special was a crunchy blueberry pancake with granola. I almost went for that but was too intrigued by the butter pecan pancakes. Meanwhile the rest of the menu had a bit of creole and Cajun flair. Even some of the breakfast items showed a spicy side. My companion went with the chicken and waffles which came with a side of beans. He said the chicken was fresh (and not pre-made or frozen as some of these establishments use) and that the beans were really good. I did a mandatory tasting of the beans to make sure and he was right! My pancakes were great too. They came out covered in chopped pecans, made with a fluffy and somewhat creamy batter. A short stack was more than I could eat.
A woman came in after us and made the cut 5 minutes before the kitchen closed. Having been told this she tried to leave but the staff insisted it was fine so she came in, ordered one hell of a BLT and enjoyed the music with us, happily singing along to Queen and smiling. I love Queen but to be honest it was hearing the Muppet’s Phenomina song that made me smile ear to ear. Can’t say I’ve ever heard it played in public!
There was enough on the menu here to want to come back and try something else. I think we found a winner.
Mystic Aquarium has been on my bucket list for a few years now. Everyone I talked to seemed to rave about it saying it was better than the Boston Aquarium. The only issues were that I didn’t really want to go during the summer season when I was sure it’d be packed and I also wasn’t sure the $41 per adult ticket fee was reasonable. I mean, that’s a lot, especially for someone like me who likes to blog destinations that are accessible even to the poorest of people, *cough cough* myself. But you know, there comes a day for everything.
It was the dead of winter, there was snow on the ground, the sky was gray and the temperatures were let’s just say nippy in the 20s. We figured this would mean the aquarium would be more or less dead and we could wander around like the soul survivors of a zombie apocalypse. But alas no!
When we drove up the entire parking lot was FULL with numerous cars circling trying to find a spot. I wandered into overflow parking which was also almost at capacity. We parked, looked incredulously at each other, and started to walk towards the ticket master which it appears has been replaced with a self sign-in kiosk. Probably for the best. We weren’t even in the gates yet and we were swarmed on all sides by dozens and dozens of babies and toddlers, accompanied by their mums, scarcely a dad in sight. No children seemingly over the age of five and so many of them all bundled up in tiny parkas wandering around in the cold and the gloom. What was going on?!
I’ve been to the Boston Aquarium many times (before it’s somewhat recent renovations) and I naively thought aquariums were indoor facilities. Not this time. We waddled up to the first large outdoor tank which held three beluga whales. I’ve never seen a beluga whale before and they… looked like rubbery marshmallows with weird blubbery heads. I struggled to figure out if they were adorable or only a face a mother could love. Two swam around while a third was vertical and lazily drifting from the bottom to the top, to the bottom again. Weird.
Somewhat embarrassingly I still don’t have a coat at this point in my life (after getting too plump to fit in my all-time favorite coat and then declaring I was not going to buy another one, I was just going to lose the weight! Ha! I’m just as pale and chonky as those damn belugas now. And unrepentant about it.) So, I stuffed my hands in my sweater sleaves and continued on. Boy, was I surprised how much of the aquarium is outside! There was a lot! Belugas, sea lions, seals, walruses, and even penguins. Each had a volunteer attempting to tell us about the animals but I think they were just as overwhelmed by this bizarre massive influx of toddlers as we were. They seemed tired and just narrated in monotone, “And that’s Stella there… the one who just came to the surface…And now she’s gone back down again…” Very informative.
The penguins were my favorite of these outdoor enclosures because they were cute and I didn’t feel like they’d rip me to shreds if I accidentally tumbled into their enclosure. I wasn’t so sure about the seals and whatnot. Those things had massive teeth and moved through the water with a disturbing quickness. Sea puppy my ass, those are just wet Shutzhunds.
I was quite content to be moving indoors after this. As we walked in there was a circular tank just within the door with what I would guess were saltwater fish who were “donated” to the aquarium when they got too big or expensive to maintain by private owners. Later on, I’d see a full-grown Achilles Tang and be in total shock. Never knew they got that big! YIKES.
From here there were all sorts of tanks with various kinds of fish and habitats. There was one poor woman (my companion thinks a volunteer) nervously following the swarm of tiny people, a rag in one hand frantically wiping the boogers and apple sauce off the glass as if she thought it might be acid. Germaphobe? Overstimulated staff? Who knows! But whatever they were paying her it wasn’t enough.
I was happy to see all sorts of fish and critters I’d never seen before. Big fish, little fish, fresh water fish, marine fish. A shark and stingray touch tank was nearby. I pondered if they could catch measles. I hoped not. In any event there were colorful cichlids, charismatic Amazonian fish, and a surprising amount of non-fish critters which included some huge crabs, a spiny lobster, the cutest damn frogs I could have possibly asked for, and of course a few turtles scattered about as well as a few lizards and creepy crawlies. I could probably park myself in front of one of these tanks for a while and just relax… if it weren’t for all the crying and screaming. I did find one mother with her baby doing just that. She was talking about the octopus although it was unclear if she was narrating to her baby or trying to talk to us, the only other unoccupied adults. I get it. Being a single mom is HARD and often very very lonely. I commented the octopus was pretty neat and I think it was funny he had a dog toy in his pen.
From here my companion insisted we see the sea lion show. OK… It wasn’t any additional charge, we just had to be there on time. So we wandered in and took a seat in what would end up being a pretty damn full gallery. The humans in this performance bounced out with the energy of a highly caffeinated children’s TV host and the kids ATE IT UP. The premise of the show was that there was a mission to be accomplished with the help of the kiddies in the audience. They yelled on command and did little poses. It was kind of heartwarming and adorable.
There were three seals performing that day and they were enthusiastically silly, jumping, swimming, striking poses, shaking their weird rubbery dog heads yes and no, retrieving props and waving, you know, all the classics. I laughed with the children. It was all very sweet and had an anti-global warming message which… these days it’s just nice to see science out in the open without being screamed at by a flat earthers or whatever.
After the show we wandered back out, saw the tanks we had not yet seen, and decided to try the additional bonus exhibit which this month was Sea Dinosaurs. What? I get to see dinosaurs too?? Yes please! This was an additional $15 a person. We paid and wandered in. The ceiling was decorated with big replicas of fossil sea creatures – mostly ammonites. Inside the main hall there was what I can only describe as a scrabbling course for children which put them in harnesses and let them climb on platforms and tightropes above the crowd. If I were three feet tall I would have been ALL OVER THAT. I sighed at my cracking joints and lamented that youth is wasted on the young.
We wandered about for a while finding a self photo booth with megalodon jaws, a projector sand pit, and some sort of weird psychedelic acid trip of a thing that made our dancing silhouettes into a mass of crazy colors in real time. That was fun. Really fed my inner child. Again, I probably would have poked more at these if it wasn’t such a busy and chaotic day for the aquarium. People tend to look at adults funny when they cheekily decide to play too, though I don’t think there’s anything wrong with this and do believe the world would be a better place with more whimsy and less taking ourselves so seriously.
And so that was our trip to the aquarium. We left laughing but kind of exhausted to go to an old haunt Mystic Pizza for lunch. It never disappoints.
This week was another amazing food find. We were on the road searching for a birthday present (which proved stupidly hard to find) when we decided to stop at a new place for a late breakfast. This place said it served breakfast until 3pm. That’s my kinda eatery.
A day earlier my companion was teasing me because I said I rarely crave sweets but my usual choices for breakfasts suggested otherwise. I protested these were not cravings but whims. And despite the fact this place had a slew of more reasonable options I couldn’t help to go glassy-eyed with wonder when our waitress started rattling off their breakfast specials from the day. I couldn’t keep any of them straight but they sounded like the most whimsically deranged breakfast themed dessert cart one could dream up. Oreos were mentioned as were chocolate chips, a variety of sticky sweet syrups, and even cinnobuns. My resolve was tested and it suffered a resounding failure as I ordered the stuffed Cinnabon French toast. My companion on the other hand chose a more savory option, the Hamilton Kitchen Sink which came out looking like a garbage plate (and I say that with love, not judgement.) It was a pancake, bacon, sausage, eggs, a biscuit, and a truck load of home fries smothered in white gravy. We’re both very chosey with homefries but I’m happy to note I tried one with gravy and it was goddamn delicious to the both of us.
Meanwhile my plate was a war crime to diabetes but ahhhhhh, it was so good! The cinnobuns were made into French toast, stuffed with cream cheese and jam and topped with a truly indecent amount of whipped cream. I didn’t even have to put any syrup on it.
Our waitress joked it could be made better with chocolate chips. If I had only had a tiny white flag to wave back at her. I ate most my meal, was stuffed to the gills and couldn’t take on the last few bites but wow. Do I regret my heart challenging option? Nah, no other place has made me want to yell ‘you only live once’ like this place! I have learned nothing.
So it’s been a tick since I have stopped by this blog. Back in the autumn a deer decided to pick a fight with my car and it’s been in the shop for months and I… have been taking a bit of a involuntary hiatus. But this week I did get out for a much needed little jaunt.
The Find on 6 is a consignment and antique store that features a main shop and one big room off of it which was clearly a greenhouse at some point. It was easy to find and charming. Everything was displayed very well and the prices COULD NOT BE BEAT. Seriously, they were beyond affordable. I found two baby blue couches with two matching chairs, all tufted and in great condition. The couch was FORTY EIGHT DOLLARS (after the 26th, but starting at SIXTY-FIVE which is still insanely affordable!!) The chairs were cheaper! I have never wanted to rescue something so bad in my life. But alas! I do not own a Victorian home with a parlour, or a car big enough to fit a couch. Life is just not fair sometimes. So instead of rescuing this adorable living room set I instead let it live in my fantasies when I’m daydreaming about running my own tropical fish store. The couches will be in front of the big display tanks because I believe firmly in building community and encouraging “the slow life.”
The rest of the shop had a fun mix of weird things – a pile of books from a local author, some delightfully bizarre and unique bric-a-bracs and dish wear, a series of items that defied identification, a mimeograph, lots of roosters, and a series of very nice kitchen knives for cheap. I would have likely bought one of those if I didn’t JUST get a good knife for Christmas. I did buy the book about Rhode Island by a local author. One never knows if such things can’t be further inspiration for travels.
I am making a note to come back here if I ever have a house to see what they have for quirky furniture. This place was awesome.
We weren’t able to make all of Saturdays activities but we showed up in enough time to catch quite a few of them. Luckily for me traffic was waaay better and we got there early enough to catch a bite to eat without having to eat it while jogging like the day before. I also got to see a gondolah and a deaf couple having an increasingly intense argument with sign language on our walk there. Those were firsts for me.
The vendors were still set up with T-shirts and happily chatted with patrons, the ticket seller remembered us from the day before. I mulled over a sweet little button-up shirt with a cthulhu on it but it was $50 and I realize since getting fat (and growing a stupidly pendulous set of boobs) that cute button ups are best left in my youthful days of thin androgyny. Now if I get a button up shirt that’s half a size too small my boobs are peering through make-shift windows between the buttons and buy one too large and suddenly I’m swimming in a trash bag. Annoying. Curvy people like being cute too.
ANYWAY, once we got in I looked around at an audience that was a couple times the size of the previous day although the theater was far from packed. They were however enthusiastic, even if small in number.
On this night we got to watch several blocks of shorts and a feature film. They were as follows:
Onan’s Harvest: I would have titled this Something Pagan This Way Comes. Just a lot of creatures, and masks, and weird magic in the woods.
After the Fall: Maybe it’s the state of the world today but this one seemed a metaphor for living under fascism via a be-tenticled sky creature.
Triangle: Which was actually a pyramid but I won’t be pedantic. Nothing like basing an entire short on a locked pyramid shaped box with floaty numbers and an attached warning from the village witch.
Five-Star: I’m really scratching my head on this one as I remember absolutely nothing from it. The blurb of it reads, “A diligent locksmith is on a quest for a five star review.” Soooo…. I’m guessing he failed but whose to say! Not me. *nervous chuckle*
Observer: A classic space horror, watching the last memories of a deceased crew.
A Serpent’s Touch: The only thing I remember about this one was the font was so weird I thought it said A Serpent’s Couch. The blurb reads, “In 16th century England Tennebris and his son mourn the passing of the family matriarch.”
The Second Grimoire: Evil books take hold of the minds of those who keep them.
Feature Film: Daemons. This one was a fun throw back to 70’s acid tripping horror, though it takes place in the modern day and is a little more socially conscious. A real We’re All Mad Here kinda film.
Shorts of Madness was the next block which is always a crowd favorite as it is the humor shorts.
Taylor and the Strange John. Is John a frequenter of prostitutes or a toilet? That was my question. The former. Crude but in a mildly shocking giggle kind of way. It’s nice to see a tip of the hat to the working girls.
Sea Legs: Pirate brothels have never been so tenticle-y.
Fisher of Men: A classic hillbilly show down with the opponent being a swamp monster. Quirky simplistic humor that really worked. This one had me laughing pretty hard.
Dry January: A comedy about being a college age fuck-up and deciding to go sober… which for some reason includes a very up-chucky crab man. 🦀
Burned Cans for Aluminum Children: Fun with Play-D’oh! Stupidly cute/funny.
Gusti the Strong vs The Merman: This one is 100% silly. Does not take itself one iota seriously. But still absolutely hilarious. A real joy to watch.
And that was this year’s wrap-up for me although there were several things going on Sunday that we didn’t make it to.
Its that time of year again, time to brandish some scary T-shirts and join the other lovable weirdoes at the H P Lovecraft film festival. This year has been BRUTAL. Things are bleak and we are already feeling like we’re living through a horror movie. Still, it was a MUCH needed break to attend this year. Curiously traffic was horrendous getting into Providence so we ended up late, scarfing down some fast food while jogging to the RISD. We made it just on time, though one of our companions had to relinquish the burning hot fries he had failed to eat while jogging. No food in the theater.
It was a small but dedicated crowd this year. On this night we got to see a block of horror shorts followed by a 40th Anniversary viewing of the ever-grusome satirical cult classic Re-Animator followed by a Q & A with the screen writer, which was for me more entertaining than I anticipated.
The shorts were as follows:
The Outsider: A three minute animation making it’s US debute from Canada. This one showed the struggles of a lonely cyclops just trying to find their people with a comical twist ending.
Stargazer: Answers the question what if stars could come to earth as people and seduce socially fucked up astronomers.
Undertone: I think I was mentally somewhere else for the entire 13 minutes of this one. Despite this being yesterday I remember exactly nothing of it. SORRY.
The Music of Erich Zann: A recently restored 1980’s short depicting how music can drive you mad. Cosmically mad. Ahhhhhhh.
Where the Shadows Feast: This one wasn’t just horror but also a film noir with a black male lead and I must say, I am all here for that. He did a great job and the “shadows” were effectively scary/unnerving which is a high compliment coming from me. Generally I just find horror monsters hilarious… which I think is why people keep looking at me with recognition. Oh, the psycho laugher is back. 😬
The Itch: If ever there were a horror concept I’d be intimately aware of it’d be this. I’ve itched off layers of skin on many occasions and have had yeast infections so angry its made me want to fuck a wad of steel wool. I have not however accidentally killed myself itching too hard. This one had a fun rivalry and a couple twists.
Thrift Store Ouija Board: This one was just super juvenile. Teen girls having a super stupid teen girl spat with the aid of a ouija board. Also if you’re wondering the moving triangle piece on a ouija board is called a planchette. You’re welcome.
And then that brought us to Re-Animator which I’ve seen but apparently repressed 90% of it. The only thing I remembered was the actors. They looked familiar. Sorta. But anyway, it was gorey, gross, and fucked up in that special kind of way that you only see when a group of writers gather around and egg eachother on to write the most depraved thing ever. I respect it for that. I respect it more for adding humor over the top of that. It is however very much a movie of its time with the only woman present a bit of an annoying bobble-headed blonde. There was an attempted rape scene enacted by a decapitated head so that was… just ewe. Honestly, I felt this was more ewe than all the other ewes. And there was a lot of other ewes.
Afterwards the screenwriter Dennis Paoli took questions and talked a little about it. He explained it was a very short run film that only played in a handful of theaters because it was unrated (GEE, I WONDER WHY) and that it gained popularity when it came out on VHS. Now its a cult classic and I’m happy it was never remade. I can deal with 70’s gore but hyper realistic current gore would be too much for me personally. He also accidentally brought the mood of the entire room down by pointing out all the themes in the movie that made it so terrifying – male researchers who don’t know when to stop, the promise of great wealth to potentially evil creations, a broken health care system, humanity’s fear of death, and even the horror of college loans are probably all worse today than 40 years ago. Weren’t we all here to momentarily escape the bleakness of current American living?
Luckily he cheered us all right back up by wandering way off the beaten path and telling us how his theater play version of Peter Pan was banned for nudity. Peter Pan was re-imagined as a hippie, Tinkerbell was his boyfriend, the Indians were replaced with black folk, the pirates were Chicago police, flying was just tripping on acid and the flying scene was both male and female actors dancing naked to In A Gadda Da Vida. “And we didn’t even change the dialogue at all from the origional. It just worked.” And now I want to time travel to see this. I already had a soft spot of fucked up retellings of Peter Pan since I saw an absolutely god awful independant film called Neverland: Never Grow Up, Never Grow Old where Tinkerbell was a user/seller of fairy dust, Neverland was an abandoned amusement park, and Hook was a Pan-obsessed leather bound pedophile. This makes me nostalgic for the independant film era of the 2000s before corporations bought them all out and turned them back to shit. To be fair this entire film festival makes me want to start making my own little films. Probably animation as I don’t have the people skills to successfully convince a handful of “actors” to run through a park acting crazy or whatever I’d need to accomplish such a task. My creative mind is still aching to play, even as the rest of me is crushed by currant circumstance. Tell you what though, if ever globalized healthcare and universal basic income become a thing here in the US I promise I’ll make y’all a little film.
What better way to follow up a visit to the pirate museum than to find ourselves a rocking grilled cheese joint?
It was a gorgeous summer day but there was an alarming lack of tourists around. I suppose a sign of the times. Even so I parked in a super easy parallel parking spot in front of the JFK museum having no idea the next half a mile had oodles of parking spots. Oh well, can’t complain too much about getting a little exercise, especially when the stoner-friendly sandwiches we were after were probably about a billion calories each. On this day I did not care.
When we finally arrived we found a vendor and an outdoor cafe space. A woman was already at the window waiting for her order when we ambled up to look at the menu. She turned around to tell us, “Everything is great here! You’re going to love it!” High praise, we both laughed and thanked her for the unsolicited review.
I wanted fries with my sandwhich so we decided to split a poutine and each get a different weird sandwhich. Pretty sure my companion got the Country Boy and myself the Veggie Daddy. The cashier on this day was having a day, for sure. He was straight from a wedding in Florida and clearly very tired. He couldn’t remember the order and asked my companion to repeat Veggie Daddy until it was uncomfortable but luckily we were both laughing at this because it was hot, we were being a pain in the ass taking forever to decide, and we could empathize with a little brain fog. Our reward for being a sport about this was being able to sample their home made hibiscus ice tea and lavendar lemonade. Both were really good but the tea was amazing so the pitch worked!
We sat at one of the tables and waited, our server clearly as entertained by us as we were of him, yelling, “I’m going to take care of you!” And he did. Even drew smiley faces in our dipping sauce. It was fucking adorable.
And the sandwiches… oh my god. Totally worth the fact they probably went straight to the arteries! The dipping sauce was another fun touch. They were SO MESSY and sooo good. I got it all over my shirt and sighed. Can’t bring me anywhere.
I was so full by this point. Even so my server came back out to offer a refill on my ice tea as we were cleaning up. I was tempted but then I’d have to carry an open cup to the car. Instead I thanked my server and smiled. He said, “You guys are great!” Before returning.
I know I haven’t been giving my beloved blog much attention lately but it’s only because my chronic fatigue has been working me over like a steam roller this summer so I haven’t been able to make it out of the house very often. So too has my usual travel companion who is currently being pushed to the brink by his capitalist overlords. As such we both desperately needed a more unusual outing, an extra little escape from the bleakness of reality. I pitched the Wydah Pirate Museum because you can’t beat pirates!
The Wydah Pirate Museum is an entire museum based on one very lucky discovery of a sunken pirate ship off the coast of Cape Cod. I’ve always wanted to see an old wooden shipwreck but am also phobic of the ocean so barring that this seemed a nice compromise.
We ended up during peak traffic hours on a gorgeous summer day so by the time we got there I was in no mood to be fighting with the GPS who didn’t feel it was nessassary to tell me which side of the road I was supposed to find this establishment. It is set back from the road with an underwhelming forefront so I drove right past it and ended up turning into a big seemingly abandoned parking lot which turned out to be almost directly across the road. And then I had to dodge two lanes of unrelenting traffic to get across said road which nearly ended in catastrophe when I saw a break in the traffic and slammed the gas to the floor only to have my wussy little Prius bottom out and only kick in a full second or two later. No one died, not even the Prius. Thank God.
As I drove in I was one of several cars there. Outside there was a big banner above the door to what looked like a big metal warehouse. This was almost as sketchy looking as all those salt water fish stores.
Fortunately the inside was completely different. Two teenagers joyfully tended the entrance desk and told us this was a no photo establishment and self guided tours started in an adjoining room where a short video played on a loop. Under the screen was a big gold bell in a tank which was apparently the first thing they found on this wreck.
Travellings into the museum itself we found LOTS of plaques and information, the usual scattering of creepy wax dummies, and a few cases of random things found. We learned this particular ship had a 40% black crew as well as numerous indigenous members and a random twelve year old runaway whose boot and shinbone were found and were currently on display. This was all news to me. I knew black pirates were a thing but I had no idea there were so many and why would an indigenous person want to be a pirate?? I had no answers on that one although the picture was much clearer for the black crew members who through escape and mutiny had chosen the pirate life over slavery. There was also a small display honoring the women pirates who dressed as men to take on this life which to me sounds like some transmen found belonging in a diverse democracy at sea. I’m telling you pirates sound better at governing than our own land based government.
I also got to see some twisted and broken pirate pistols and learned why pirate guns always seemed so cartoonishly large – its because they’re not hand guns, they’re literally sawed off shotguns. Remind me not to get on the bad side of a pirate.
There was even a little station where you could touch some of the coins dredged up during this escavation. They were well polished and worn by being pawed at by thousands of fingers and yet it was still pretty cool to touch someone’s spare change from hundreds of years ago. Also on display were real gold deblooms and pieces of six. They looked so much more primitive than I’d imagined.
But the most unique display was a whole room of various fish tanks filled with large chunks of the wreck that had been encased in mineral deposits and needed to be slowly melted away with the magic of water erosion. There were X-rays revealing what was in these strange rocks. I had always thought corals may take over these sunken vessels, it never occurred to me they’d be slowly enveloped by rock over time, like fossils! Of pirate guns.
Finally there was a slew of displays on what ultimately happened to the pirates who were caught. Spoliers: nothing good. Sort of brought my mood down a bit to be honest. I was rooting for these probably ADHD-addled sea rogues.
We took a moment to play at the knot tying station before scanning the gift shop for morbid loot. There were indeed books a plenty but I left them on this day feeling the $18 entrance fee was already quite enough to spend.
Off we went. I took a selfie outside with one of the wooden pirates so I’d have something to post here, having obeyed the rules of the inside museum.
I decided to go berry picking this summer because its been many many years since I have done so. And I heard rumors there was a berry farm nearby that had more than just blueberries. Monadnock Berries boasted of blueberries, raspberries, goose berries, red currants, black currants, and white currants. I have never eaten gooseberries or currants so I was keen to check this out. I brought my mother with me even though she’d heard it’d be expensive.
There were signs from the center of town you could follow but it was pretty far out in the woods on a dirt road. You just had to trust there’d be more signs or that your GPS was worth trusting.
Finally we got to the farm which had a nice dirt parking lot on a hill. We followed more signs into a cute little shop which had pre-picked berries, maple syrup, and a few other commodities. There were also cartons and buckets of various sizes to go picking ourselves. We were told we could mix all the berries if we chose to except for the raspberries. They were more expensive and apparently turn into sludge if you pile other berries on top of them – hence the need for separation. As such I declined the raspberries and bought a “small bucket” for $22. It didn’t look big but boy, by the time we were done we had over four pounds of berries! That’s an overflowing large Pyrex mixing bowl! If you’re familiar with how much a tiny carton of berries cost you’ll know this was a steal, the very opposite of expensive.
There were maps via QR code but also signs everywhere. The blueberries were endless, just bunches of bushes. We found the raspberries next, and in front of them was the first row of currants, all black. I tried them and found them to be quite displeasing to my pallet but this was a matter of personal taste. The red currants were nearby and had a remarkably different flavor profile. They were very tangy! I started throwing fistfuls of them into the bucket. The bushes at first didn’t look like they had much on them but with a little closer inspection the lower branches were heavy with berries.
My mother at this point got very into picking red currants and took some convincing to move on. The gooseberries were a good walk away, snuggled next to the white currants which had a delightfully mild taste. The gooseberries were robust in their unique flavor. These two ended up being my favorite berries of the day.
By now it was getting hot, I was overheating, and it was threatening to rain. Our bucket was nearly full anyway so I said we should get some blueberries to top it all off as we walked back towards the store. I was surprised to find the blueberries from different rows also tasted different, perhaps they were of different varieties. I settled on a bush with very large blueberries which I felt were the sweetest. When the bucket was filled we walked back to the counter which felt like it was miles away in the heat. When we turned in the bucket the teenage cashier pulled out the plastic bag lining the bucket and exclaimed how happy it made her to see currants under the top layer of blueberries. Both the teenage girls working today were so friendly and funny I couldnt help but adore their youthful enthusiasm. I paid my $22 and got a cold drink to go.
All and all this was a really fun day. We made out like bandits and there were some adorable goats in a pasture next to the parking lot. This place was awesome. Well worth a visit and family friendly to boot! I could have spent all day taking photos of the luscious berries and the sprawling mountain landscape beyond. This place was gorgeous. I guess that’s why they also host weddings here on Saturdays. I was impressed.
