Farewell Feast with Family

I was invited to go to a farewell feast at my father’s shortly before I was to leave so I decided to do this a few days beforehand. They thought it would be amusing to come up with an outrageous set of dinner courses that I may not have ever tried before. These were classic New England dishes, seafood to be exact, and although I was aware of this I still didn’t really prepare for what was coming.

There before me in a bowl was a set of “steamers” or little necked clams as the stores called them. I must have given off quite an expression of repulsion although I was trying desperately to do the opposite. I don’t make a habit of offending the cook. Wendy must have picked up on this as she started to immediately tell me I didn’t have to eat them. Well, they were cooked, who cares if I was plucking the remains of their cousins off the beaches of Maine just a few weeks ago.

I opened up the little shell and there was this gelatinous completely alien-looking piece of flesh staring up at me. It had a rubber band like “body” a bulging soft “stomach” and a hard brown “neck.” None of these labels struck me as being particularly anatomically correct but who am to say? This creature was utterly strange and seemed to be composed entirely of just a digestive system in a shell. I bit into the belly, it was delicate in flavor and texture and honestly wasn’t that bad. Texturewise it was most like a scallop but a lot smoother and softer. A pile of green goo that must have been its last meal spilled out onto my plate. Oh, look at that, the stomach might actually be a stomach. I couldn’t eat the fibrous ribbon-like body, just touching a piece of it with my teeth almost resulted in me ralphing all over the table but hey look! At least I can say I tried!

The next course was rice and shrimp. I have always loved shrimp, but currently I was keeping one as a pet. I mentioned this and Wendy immediately spat out an apology, but it wasn’t necessary, I thoroughly enjoyed the dish.

The next dish was lobster. This I expected.  I snapped mine’s tail off with a loud crack and pulled out its meat with a fondue fork. I devoured the tasty morsels in butter and moved on to its claws were it soon lost a thumb with another loud crack and then to add insult to injury we took a nutcracker after the lower claw. I was told all the legs come right off in a clump if we wanted to eat the guts in the main body… I didn’t… I still ripped mine off… more green goo… I sucked on the little ant-like legs with a morbid sort of glee, maintaining this was the most amusing part of eating lobster.

I was past full but there was more. Now it was two slices of seedless watermelon which was so good. Then I was given fresh raspberries on top of a canned pear, everything swimming under home-made whip cream. Now that is a dessert I can appreciate, simple and delicious! More watermelon. Then marshmallows, the big ones, toasted on the fire in the drizzly rain.

I showed Wendy that you could peel and eat the big marshmallows numerous times. I also dropped a marshmallow on the coal and watched it turn into a giant blob of white lava ooze. Wendy was horrified and fascinated, guess she’s never done that with a marshmallow. Her reaction amused me.

I also visited the horses while I was there and checked up on their three wee poodles, all so much better behaved than my mothers. SIGH. All and all we had a fantastic dinner, good conversation, and nothing was too awkward as it sometimes can be.

If you are enjoying Catching Marbles please consider adding a dollar or two to my limited gas money fund so I can continue going on adventures and sharing them with you! Thank you!


Introduction & Invitation

In May of 2011 I set off to see what this great country  has to offer. I packed up the Jeep with a tent, some sleeping bags, my meager savings, and a sack full of hope. The journey would take me seventy four days and bring me through all the Lower 48 states. I went everywhere from Acadia to Yellowstone and everywhere in between. I witnessed a slew of eccentric people living in every corner and enjoyed the vast natural beauty that there was to see. I greeted a haunted doll in Florida, I dug for fossils in Wyoming, I accidentally kicked a wild peccary in Texas. Never again would I be at a loss for stories to tell!

So please, join me on my travels in my newly moved blog – Catching Marbles – I know the photos are old and probably not the best quality by my writing is as sharp as ever and the adventure just as sharp in my mind. And if you’re still around reading by the end of that journey you are welcome to follow me on my newest adventures, traveling to the beautifully obscure spots of New England!

As always, keep strong, be brave, close your eyes, and JUMP!

If you are enjoying Catching Marbles please consider adding a dollar or two to my limited gas money fund so I can continue going on adventures and sharing them with you! Thank you!


Humanwine Concert – Keene NH

A while back I went to a Jason Webley concert. It was a crazy night. I had no idea who he was and when I arrived at a huge house that I was pretty sure was being used as a modern day commune I couldn’t help but laugh. “Tickets” were $5. There was a tiny fairy door in the wall. The audience was delightfully strange and musician singing… well let’s just say I wasn’t really expecting an accordion recounting 1980’s hits. How could I not be drawn like a moth to the flame when I heard he’d be back in Keene to sing again, this time as a warm up to another band I’d never heard of – Humanwine.

I got there an hour early so I fussed about in the rain going to Home Depot, Wal-mart, and Target in search of an elusive folding camp table. I didn’t find any, but made due with a much smaller wrought iron table. Traveling back to Main Street I found The Starving Artist. I guess it’s just a littler performance house. I walked in, passed over the $7 admission and looked around. It was a small place, there was perhaps thirty people here. I found an old beaten up couch in back with a long rip down its front. Cozy. I was a little bit early but not too bad. I didn’t expect more people to file in at a steady pace until the place was truly packed. There were perhaps fifty people here, some sitting on the floor, others standing in back, and the majority sitting in chairs. There were more beards and berets here than I have seen in my life. There was also a number of women with flapper haircuts. Three people with blue hair, a pregnant woman, a number of lesbians, some sort of gender interloper, an ungodly amount of Caucasian dreadlocks, people of all ages from teens to middle aged, and even two piss-faced drunks. One of those was so clichéd I could have laughed as he wobbled across the room, paper bag filled with two vodka bottles, in hand.

If I thought the crowd was interesting I was about to be surprised by the band. I decided it would be far more fun not looking them up prior to coming here. I figured it’d be interesting anyway, why not surprise myself? It was a band of two, the singer was a chick running around with facial and neck tattoos, a raccoon tail pinned to her backside, and a tool belt displaying a wee Bowie knife, as if she were planning to nab another raccoon should this tail wander off. Interesting. I listened intently when she started singing her chaotic, often punderfully titled, songs about political strife and how much people suck. I smiled. It was really fucking hot in the building and upon arriving I was already really tired and ready for bed. When the heat hit me I could barely keep my eyes open… that is until she got the whole audience bouncing about and yelling the chorus to one of the songs, which just happened to be, “WAKE UP! WAKE UP!” I woke up. After that I really started to have fun, even though I really couldn’t understand what she was singing most of the time, though she did a kick ass trumpet impression. I had no idea the human voice could do that…

After intermission Jason Webley came around. Strangely enough most of the people here seemed to be here for him. He gave his usual psychotically enthusiastic performance, gently harassing the people getting up and leaving to come in and out, “Next time they come back in everyone say welcome! And maybe clap!” We all did.. This was another one of those audience participation things. After singing Icarus and a few other songs he went to his usual routine of asking the audience if they wanted to hear any 80’s music that shouldn’t be played on an accordion on an accordion… You know like the Eurythmics Sweet Dreams. Of course he also did his free-style lyrically rearranged version of Free Bird as well. It remains good for a chuckle.

Eventually everyone was handed bottles with change or rocks in them to shake violently along with one of the songs. Everyone was clapping and stamping their feet a good amount of the time too, singing along when instructed to. It was all very noisy and fun. A strange moment of focus was given when he read an excerpt from a book but this was lost as he gave a farewell speech, saying he was leaving the music world for awhile… He struggled with words on that one so badly it was almost painful to watch but eventually ended the whole performance with something bouncy. We all left happy.

If you are enjoying Catching Marbles please consider adding a dollar or two to my limited gas money fund so I can continue going on adventures and sharing them with you! Thank you!


 

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