Hussy’s General Store – Windsor Maine

I know what you’re thinking. In the middle of a pandemic what on earth am I sitting here blogging about a general store? And usually I’d agree with you…. but these were special circumstances. I was already in Maine, with a passenger in tow, and we were all set and ready to spend a few days responsibly hiking. The only problem was that before we even got to that point his shoes gave out on him and here I was trying to come up with where to buy shoes in the middle of nowhere. You might think, “Just Google a shoe store” but this is Maine… the closest actual shoe store was 40 minutes away. So instead I went to a few general stores which are everywhere. For those of you unaware of what a general store is just think of an old Woolworths. The sort of thing pioneers shopped at long before Wal-Mart existed. And in doing this I remembered the biggest and most amusing of these stores was also about 40 minutes away so why not?

It’s name, Hussy’s, is already reason to raise an eye brow or two but this place is actually a bit famous. They have quite the gimmick you see – as they sell “beer, guns, and wedding dresses.” Everything you need for a shotgun wedding! And I can testify women absolutely do buy wedding gowns here. It’s somewhat of a local tradition. Obviously, if they had all these things they must have some shoes…

I’ve been to Hussy’s before but I never got the chance to take photos or blog it. This time I made sure to take a photo of the sign out front. My travel companion for the day loved this place. It had “character.” He’s a city mouse and used to large chains and an endless strip mall of soulless corporations. Coming here – to this quirky roadside attraction – was apparently quite the experience. There was just so much to see! The usual collection of country chic brac-a-bracs, a whole section dedicated to old timey toys, lots of soda, beer, and dry goods. And of course when we wandered upstairs things got even more odd. I stopped by a display of rabbit furs. Nearby there were fox heads, various pelts, and genuine coonskin hats. On the walls there were moose heads and taxidermied coyotes and then we ran into the guns… I was tranfixed for a second because they were oddly beautiful. It was a whole display of old classic revolvers, the sort of thing you think might be dug out of old attics or randomly out of the ground.

“They look so old.” I scratched my head.

“They do.”

But then around the corner was a huge counter full of more modern arms. A little bit of everything. The man there asked if there was anything he could do for us and I tried not to laugh. I’m not a gun person but I have seen it all before however this was the first time my companion had ever been to a gun shop and the variety threw him off, I think.

“You even have knives!” Oh yes, so many pretty knives. And tools. And camping gear. And yes, wedding dresses. I was intent on finding a bottle of Moxie to feed my unfortunate guinea pig. I mean you can’t go to Maine and not try Moxie… that’d be blasphemous.

“It’s like cola right?”

Hahahahaha!”

Sadly, I didn’t find any Moxie… or else there’d be an attached video of the tasting. Sigh. We also didn’t find any shoes that were up to snuff so we left empty handed. It was a nice little detour but the place made me nervous as no one was wearing masks… not customers, not even staff, so when I left I basically bathed in hand sanitizer when I got back to the car. Off to an actual shoe store!

Sarah’s Hat Boxes – Hancock NH

When life gets too chaotic sometimes it’s nice to just set some time aside to enjoy the whimsy of the completely random. Today I decided to return to the place that sort of inspired the second beginning of this blog a few years ago. It’s a quirky little place called Sarah’s Hat Boxes. I had stumbled in there out of curiosity one day wondering who in this day and age was trying to make a business out of selling something as antiquated and obscure as hat boxes? I mean I knew what hat boxes were but there aren’t too many Jackie Kennedys running around in dire need of such a thing. I was as happily surprised then as I was today even though the location has changed.

Currently Sarah’s Hat Boxes is located in Hancock NH, which and of itself is a beautiful area to explore. It sits alone in a somewhat hidden location but with a very obvious sign out front to greet visitors. I had brought my mother with me to enjoy today’s outing because I figured as a crafter herself she might enjoy this little gem. Upon entering we were surrounded by all sorts of colors and patterns of fabric boxes in all sizes. Everything from the delicate to the gigantic which I had mum stand next to just to show how grand the largest really were. A few new things adorned the walls – fabric memories of some of the more notable customers who had bought from here in the past. I got to have a long chat while I was there and got the whole history of the place. It’s a 35 year old business that started as innocently as buying a kit to make a single hat box. From there it grew and gained a reputation at craft fairs before settling in a brick and mortar store.

I know what you’re still probably thinking – but who is buying these hat boxes and why? And the answer is pretty simple. These hat boxes are gorgeous, really well made with a love and attention to detail and on top of that they weren’t all for hats. In fact the business really seems to have evolved with the times. Here were boxes used in tiers for wedding donations and cards, boxes with padded covers to stick pins and needles into for all the seamstresses out there, boxes made to fit two different sizes of wine bottles (accompanies by two glasses) and of course my favorite were the knitting boxes which had 4 compartments and holes for separate yarn. I WILL be back for one of those if I ever pick up my knitting needles again! And they were very decently priced – the knitting boxes were $38 each which I found more than reasonable considering the size and sheer quality. They were made from chipboard and fabric – really made to last.

Knitting box – four holes lead to four compartments for easy yarn use.

And some of the boxes had little histories. Several displayed images from Norman Rockwell paintings, yet another well known New England personality. Another had a map on the top dedicated to the adventures of Indiana Jones. Apparently the guy responsible for his hat came here for boxes. And the funny and strange thing about all this is just the amount of people and arts that crossed here. I would not have thought musicians, other artisans, prop designers, photographers, and other famous individuals would have ever come out to the boonies or known about this place but there it was – a pedigree of customers that spanned over seemingly every artistic field. It was fascinating and a bit inspiring to know that sometimes these little mom and pop shops that really do care about the products they’re creating can survive in the age of WalMart and Amazon.

Sewing boxes with padded covers for pins.

Of course I couldn’t really leave without taking home one of these charming little creations and so I chose the one that had caught my eye immediately upon entering the store – a little 70’s chic box with geometric designs and colors only weird people like me would probably appreciate. Even here among so many different styles it seemed a bit out of place nestled next to all the more traditionally pretty designs but it’ll have a happy home with me and should anyone need a present for a wedding, anniversary, graduation, birthday, or Christmas I’ll be sure to recommend this lovely little place.

The Turtle Gallery – Deer Isle Maine

And finally, after a good night sleep I can tell you about the third place I visited in Deer Isle – the Turtle Gallery. Again, it just happened to be en route so I decided to stop in and see what it was about. I had noticed this little coastal village seems to have a lot of galleries and I am already planning a visit just to do a tour of them! But in any case the Turtle Gallery is the one which I ended up at randomly after enjoying the Artisan’s Market and Nervous Nellies Jams and Jellies.

The Turtle Gallery was a swank little place, that’s for sure! The main gallery, as you entered, boasted a series of large colorful paintings depicting life in coastal Maine, as well as some intensely detailed very large charcoal sketches. Prices seemed to mostly stay within the $800-2000 range from what I could see. A door leading outside had a sculpture garden and when I went to check it out I found another “pop-up gallery” in a shed out there which had more folky art, mostly small sculptures.

I thought that was it but found myself wandering around the front where still more sculptures were being displayed, some metal sculptures were in brilliant colors and their shapes, texture, and color, really caught my eye. A private residence was sandwiched in between the main gallery, the outdoor sculpture garden, and the paper and glass gallery in the house at the far side. Here paintings on paper adorned the walls and a series of fantastically beautiful goblets for $800+ a piece glinted in the sun coming in from the window.

This was a peaceful and relaxed gallery displaying some really fine talent. I was happy we stopped by. I doubt I will ever be able to afford art from such a place but being around it calms my creative nerves. I must visit more galleries…

Nervous Nellie’s Jams and Jellies – Deer Isle Maine

This was possibly the most bizarre destination I have ever ended up at. It’d been suggested by several people, and of course the Internet, but no one had much to say about it, just that I needed to go. On this particular occasion I ended up with quite a carload, my mother, a cousin, and my great-aunt. We had five hours to waste so I suggested we go to Nervous Nellie’s. All of them looked at me blankly, “Suuuuure, we can go buy some jam…?” So off we went!

First off let me tell you the area it’s in is picturesque Maine seaside, absolutely beautiful, and there’s so many things to get happily distracted by including a series of high end galleries. Then there’s Nellie’s which… is so far from that scene it might as well be its own planet. When I drove in my mother didn’t want to get out of the car, “This looks scary!” She yelled, pointing at a heap of rusted metal lying haplessly in the woods. I made her get out. I always do. Besides everyone else was already bounding out.

Here, instead of the cute little jam shop I expected there was an entire Wild West village, run by an army of fronteirsfolk who happened to be made of scrap metal, recycled miscellany, and clay. They were both fascinating and terrifying, somewhere between sweet whimsy and an apocalyptic hellscape. And there was everything… a general store, a saloon, living quarters, a jail. Oh, we had fun in the jail, burbling to a couple who’d apparently made this a destination whenever they got bored. Very sweet people. I thought it was just a little mock village but this thing kept going and going and going. By the end I found myself out in the woods staring at a dead knight being loomed over by a dragon, a plywood castle half completed in the background. The Wild West town was more Whimsical but by the time I got to the knights and the dead Viking, being sent off in a half decayed boat, everyone was getting lightly unnerved. In fact the creatures drawing the wagons and carts had gone from quirky to “Soooo…. that last tab of acid is what did it, huh?” Clearly this artist had as many voices in his head as I do (which I can truly appreciate!)

I love places that encourage the desire to play in everyone from small children to the elderly. It just really brightens my day, but this isn’t even mentioning the jams! They really do have jams! And jellies! Preserves! And chutneys! All of which are free to sample at the little shop on crackers, or if you’d like to pay for a scone there’s a sweet little cafe sitting area to enjoy. Of course I sampled everything and SWEET AMBROSIA! It was like the food of the gods! it was DELICIOUS, easily the best jam I have ever had. Seriously, this jam didn’t need a tetanus-friendly amusement park to sell it, but I wasn’t complaining! Ended up with a jar of Blue Razz and Strawberry Rhubarb. It took all of my power not to eat it straight out of the jar on the way home. My mother didn’t resist temptation and ate it on a biscuit she got a gas station for dinner… SIGH.

Anyway, this is going to be a highly suggested destination from here on out for anyone who loves the quirky, bizarre, and downright delicious.


                           

 

Artisan’s Market – Deer Isle Maine

Well! I had quite an adventure today! I ended up in Brooklin Maine, attempting to visit family, but I got there five hours before her shift ended so I did what I always do, I grabbed a few unsuspecting passengers and went on an adventure!

I had heard several people say I had to go to Nervous Nellie’s Jams and Jellies, no one said why, but I knew it was in the area so I was heading out in that direction when I noticed an Artisan’s Market aside the road in the town of Deer Isle. I’d never heard of such a thing so of course I had to stop. What a lovely little detour it was!

I guess this is a common thing, happening once a week on Thursdays during the warmer months from 10-2. I was very happily surprised with the quality of vendors. They were all super sweet people, super excited to share their gorgeous little island. I have so many tips of new places to go that I know damn well I will be back! And the art these people were selling was varied and beautiful, all of it. There wasn’t a stray stitch or the slightest shoddy thing to be found. And since this was a small affair, only a handful of vendors, I took the time to take photos of each booth, a few snaps of products, and their information in case anyone might be interested.

The first two vendors were quilters with exquisitely sewn pieces. The first of which had a variety of aprons and miscellany. She was from the Forget-Me-Not Shop. which has a brick and mortar shop just down the street.

Not to be outdone The Dockside Quilt Gallery had a few full size quilts, made by someone with an innate sense of color, just absolutely stunning as well as some bags and other little things.

Maine Island Soap I stopped to talk to. They had a wonderful assortment, all sorts of delicious scents, at very reasonable prices! They must have been doing this a while because their soaps were all very uniform, something I find is uncommon among the other soapers I have come across. Anyway, they were very nice, asked if I was a photographer and I told them about the blog… and then we all took a few photos of each other which is always fun!

Next up was Nature’s Filigree Quilling, run by a another very talented and friendly woman who said she can spend up to three days working on piece. Quilling is apparently an art form where colorful paper is rolled and places together to make designs, her specialty seemed to be mostly native Maine birds and wow, they were gorgeous. If I didn’t know any better I would have never guessed they were made of paper.

From here I ended up really admiring the workmanship in Bagaduce Woodturning. There were very steam-punky looking pepper grinders, a phenomenal goblet made from an apple tree, and a bunch of wooden bowls, anything and everything that’d fit someone’s rustic lifestyle. She didn’t have a website but if something in the photos catches your eye here e-mail is cmsnow1939@icloud.com 

Bluemoon Market Arts was another brilliant surprise. This was run by another very friendly and very chatty woman who told me all sorts of cool things about nearby places to go – which sadly I didn’t get to hit today but I will be back! She was “inspired by” my orange hair and insisted on finding a piece of glass to match which she did really precisely. She doesn’t have a website but she asked me to share her Instagram… which I can’t seem to find so I have e-mailed her to ask and will link it as soon as I get it. If anything strikes your fancy her e-mail is blumn@hotmail.com 

The next few vendors didn’t have cards so I didn’t get their info but they had a wonderful mix of quilted things, more jewelry, some knitting, really nice sewing, some baskets and rugs made of recycled lobster trap rope (how Maine can you get??) and some quirky painted wooden pieces (including some flamboyantly neon pink roosters which were quite adorable.)

If you have enjoyed today’s adventure, or any of this blog, please feel free to donate to the gas money fund! Otherwise stay tuned as I write about Nervous Nellie’s Jams and Jellies and the Turtle Gallery, also on Deer Isle.


Roller Rink Antique Mall – Pittsfield Maine

Another day, another fantastically unending antique mall, filled to the brim with anything and everything my twisted heart could desire. This shop used to be an old roller skating rink but now hosts a great number of different vendors. In typical Maine fashion you will find lots and lots of random junk probably collected by a hoarder, tons of truly bizarre folk art and oddities, and the occasional tasteful antique for an equally tasteful price. This is one of my favorite places to hit when I am up here because it’s always full to the brim and the people are always charming and friendly (that goes for the customers as much as it does the dealers!)

Sooooo….. what did I find today? Well, it started with this delightfully demonic cat lamp…

“LOOK UP!” my mother kept yelling at me. “WHY?! Is something about to fall on me?!” No, there’s just a horrified baby doll hawking cigarettes up there.

Speaking of demonic cats…. This one is made out of “Real feline goat hair.” It’s as surprised as we are.

Maine is a great place to go if you collect racist black history artifacts. Most antique stores usually have a piece or two but Maine doesn’t hide them in the back room… This one struck me as even more “off” than usual! It reads, “My it shure am sweet!”

Then this was nearby. “HOLY SHIT, a black doll that looks human….” Carved from wood this was by far the least terrifying doll on offer.

Then I found this white doll shitting itself making a pouty face. Can’t really blame it. It was cuddled up with a black baby doll… and well… hatred is learned people!

Which brings me to this “topsy turvy doll….” which I think is some sort of liberal’s idea of teaching their kids equality…. but really, at the end of the day, it’s just a  naked bi-racial conjoined twin from the Twilight Zone.

Here we have a nun converting all the heathen native children… and Batman. Because Batman is totally cool with that sort of thing.

Heeeeey, it’s Burger King…. before the make-over….. just WOW….

And then I came across this little orange haired clown doll… and I actually thought it was kind of cute. Everyone else was screaming in horror.

“LOOK UP! It’s Bugs Bunny!” I don’t believe that for a second. Why is the carrot glowing like that??

This sophisticated pig says you’re made of bacon.

This little white doll has been kidnapped and dressed in the garb of an Indian. Now he’s sad.

AHHH! FOR THE LOVE OF GOD KILL IT!!

Fun trivia fact: Little Miss Muffet was the daughter of a notorious entomologist who bred deadly deadly spiders in his lab.

Remember when Steamboat Willie got Bloat? Yeah, me either.

The look of absolute disgust on this little gent’s face… it’s almost like he heard another doll reciting the original version of Catch a Tiger by the Toe….

Here’s a bunch of African animals lined up behind a meat grinder.

I don’t know what heinous crime this little fella just committed but whatever it was I think I’m OK with it.

This elk looks a little too chill to be dead. He’s like someone’s reincarnated prankster uncle…

Now welcoming the Post Traumatic Stress Disorder Doll. Limited granny edition.

I remember when I was a child I loved cuddling into bed to listen to my mother read me Snow White and the Demonic Squirrel...

Slightly morbid, Joe. Slightly morbid.

Hey! Look! It’s me fucking around!

Again I am not sure who this is supposed to be offending. It looks like a Mariachi band led by a really fat Native American woman…?

GNOMES!!! I know what you’re saying, “You’re terrified of dolls but you love gnomes?!” YES, YES I DO. And not just because their great grand daddy is supposed to be Priapus the ever-erect Greek God of Embarrassing ER Visits. 

Remember when Irish Catholics weren’t considered “white.” *whistles*

PIXIES! RUN FOR YOUR LIVES!!

I’m not sure what just happened in this little scene…. but that little boy is crying and I feel like I need a shower.

What can still suck out your soul that isn’t a haunted doll? A haunted painting of a child…. I would not hang this in my house if you paid me.

Mother: “Look a gay couple!”

Me: “THOSE ARE BUTLERS.”

I don’t know what “gall salve” is but I question the legitimacy of rubbing it on my horse.

Here’s the Prince of Maine… in case you’re wondering…. Maine totally had a prince once and this is Him. His reign was toppled when the schoolyard bully smudged mud on his velvety suit and made him eat worms.

I’m always amused by the random unnamed photos in antique stores. This one isn’t even that old. There’s probably some guy out there, we’ll call him Dave, that is wandering by going, “HEY! THAT’S FUCKING ME! WHY IS MY PHOTO HANGING IN AN ANTIQUE STORE?!”

I don’t know who this little darling is either…. but I don’t trust her….

GAWD, those pixies are everywhere!! Going to have to invest in some Fairy Spray.

Betty Boop WOULD NEVER.

A surprisingly noble stuffed turkey…

Ever had a significant other that kept lamenting, “You make me want to shoot myself!” This is the perfect gift for them. Caffeine and guns. Can’t go wrong.

I have no idea why the scalp of Charlie Chaplin and some random Mountie are 50% off… but that seems like a deal!

Another probably haunted painting… Can you get higher insurance rates on things that are possessed?

Giggling. Killer. Corn.

Finally, this pooch is guaranteed to work better than an actual guard dog…


Fairfield Antiques Mall – Fairfield Maine

Since I was already in the area cooing at my submersible friends at AquaCorals, I decided I would stop at an antique mall just down the street. I was told by locals it was huge and would take me at least two hours to rummage through. They were not kidding! This was an enormous building, several old industrial barns I think, with five winding labyrinthine floors. It just kept going and going and going… They had something for everyone here. If you’re familiar with my blog you probably already know what I was looking for – anything really bizarre and a light smattering of soul sucking dolls. I was not disappointed! And since there’s not really much more I can say on the topic I decided this entry will be a little… different. So I am taking my favorite photos of the hundreds I took and am just going to add a little…. commentary. If you’re easily offended this is probably the point you should leave this page, otherwise continue on!

Literally the first thing I saw was a giant cock… no really, isn’t he handsome? If I still ran a poultry farm he would have so come home with me.

After entering the store I stumbled onto this HUGE moose head with the most amusing sign behind him… It reads, “Hunting $50.00 per day, by written permission only.” I’m not a hunter but I sort of think this one’s already spent.

Then I found an album of what is most likely some of my distant relatives…. though this woman has a striking resemblance to Lizzie Borden and I wonder….

Followed by a set of terrifying patriotic mugs…

By this time my mother, who was tagging along in today’s adventures, was rifling through the old photos when she came across this one and finally admitted they might actually be relatives of ours…

I may have replied if I weren’t distracted by a series of pots who appeared to be blooming? Seriously though, what is up with the one on the far left?? It’s going to burst!

Two seconds later I got the sensation someone was watching me and when I turned around I found out it was Amelia Earhart. Huh.

Then I started running into the…. randomly probably quite racist items. I don’t even know which minority this is supposed to be offending. It looks like an old Asian dude wearing an Indian feather…?!

Then I found the saddest lion glued to a hot air balloon! I think he was sad because the hunter on the left shot his family…

“Pediophobia is the unwarranted, irrational and persistent fear or worry of dolls.” Why do I mention this? Oh no reason….

There is no word for the rational fear of dolls but I believe there should be. Just look at this doll and tell me there isn’t something a wee bit off there.

Of course dolls don’t always kill people. Sometimes they take out their murderous rage on other dolls. Evidence of this can be seen here. Witness the empty pram, the demonically smiling blonde looking up at the light like she just sacrificed a baby to the gods – OH LOOK! To the lefthand corner we can see the crumpled corpse of an infant! SHE DID. SHE TOTALLY SACRIFICED THAT BABY!

This doll knows something we don’t, maybe he’s next…

A common trick for serial killer dolls is to leave something shiny out for potential victims to be distracted by… Oooooo! 

AHHHH! Those soulless eyes!

No worries, this next one’s asleep – and I am terribly confused by it. Just… why??

Hey look! It’s a me! I’m not for sale though. Sorta like Alice from Alice’s Restaurant. You can get anything you want at Alice’s Restaurant, excepting Alice…

“Coulrophobia is the persistent and irrational fear of clowns.”

Coulropediophobia is the persistent and irrational fear of clown dolls. (Also I may have just made that up but it seems like it should be a thing…)

Here’s a cow who has apparently been eating cow flops…. Maybe the doll behind him was bullying him?

The eighties were a weird time when little girls across the country all bounded for joy to have their very own Little Miss Prosti-Tot. Her first name is Trix.

This baby knows something, something big, something dark. Hey where’d Trix go?

“Look! I found a re-borne! Its heavy! And cute! IT HAS DROOL!” — “Mom, put that down. It looks like it came from the morgue.”

I know this post is getting a little doll heavy but look at these giggling ankle biters…. tell me they won’t haunt your dreams tonight…

I have no idea what’s going on here…. and something tells me I don’t want to… look at that shocked expression in the back corner!

This one just ate someone’s heart, I swear, ripped it right out of their chest. That’s why she’s so gleeful.

OK OK, time to stop staring at the dolls and hope they aren’t like Weeping Angels, you know coming to kill you as soon as you blink. Look! A weird ENORMOUS painting of a moth! And a lock! How manly! It’s art for menly men!

And of course it’s not a real antique store if there isn’t any froofy furniture… I have for you, a chair, the first of many, but don’t worry, I won’t linger like I did with the dolls.

I was actually kind of impressed with this next one. It’s a bird made entirely of seeds. I call it a seedling.

I rubbed it and made three wishes. All that happened is I got thrown out for molesting the lamps.

Never trust a nun. Never trust a nurse. And never trust a cat. (Also never trust someone with too many Doctor Who jokes.)

That last rhyme said nothing of hares…. but this one doesn’t look trustworthy either.

“OK, I need you to make me a butter dish in the shape of a terrified cat….  make sure to add googly eyes.”

I’m at a lack of words for this next one. Well sort of. I mean I have words….  I just don’t think I should use them. A picture is worth a thousand after all…

Shout out to all the Mass girls…

I’m going to kill you thiiiiiiis much!

Here are some Humbolt figurines telling each other stories of lurid debauchery.

“Can’t sleep, clown’s going to eat me. Can’t sleep, clowns going to eat me.”

For a second I forgot this place actually had legitimately not-scary things for sale…

I actually sort of like this lamp…. which makes no sense since dolls and Cherubs freak me out so much…

Bet you didn’t know UnDead dolls were a thing…

PUPPY!!

Yes, if you want your crank phone to work… add wires. Always add wires.

“All the better to strangle you with!”

I found Liberace’s dinnerware…

I am as surprised as you are – granted I don’t have a bottle shoved up my backside… so maybe not.

Two old tribesmen…. fighting over CDs…. (Seriously the label said this was a CD rack…)

My eye was caught by some really sweet purple bottles…. and then I started reading them. This one literally says “2oz Sperm” which had me concerned for a moment before I continued to read “sewing machine oil.”

Unless you collect buttons you have no idea how impressive this is…

HOLY CRAP. WHAT A BEAUTIFUL CHUNK OF ORANGE… I must be delirious from the heat! (It is actually 94 degrees and muuuuuuuugggggy, so this may be a hallucination. Either way I don’t have $45 or a place to put such a wonder…)

OK, now I am positive I am hallucinating because that wall hanging looks like Wilfred, that crude smack-talking Australian dude in a dog outfit…

PLEASE NO homoerotic displays “DANCING” Coincidentally this sign also reminded me of this scene:

The Doctor: We were talking about dancing.

Captain Jack: It didn’t look like talking.

Rose Tyler: It didn’t feel like dancing.

I’m not going to ask what he’s spitting out.

OH HELL NO. FETCH ME THE FLY SWATTER!! QUICK!!

I found a soulless cocker spaniel. Who knew!

Who stole the cookie from the cookie jar? No one, because no one dared…. holy crap is this thing scary!

A tiny doll mink trap!

This doll is not amused by that last joke. She knew another doll whose porcelain ankle was shattered by a doll mink trap once…

My mother, “I had a doll exactly like this once!” Damned if I didn’t know that – her brother bought it for her when they were children and her other brother ripped off its fingers. She kept the fingers in a tiny drawer hoping someday to glue them back on but then the doll got ruined or thrown out or something and all that was left were tiny tiny disembodied fingers…. which I found later. You know what? This could begin to explain my ill ease with dolls…

WHY?!

LOVE the sign behind these two soulless dears. “Visitors of hotel guests MUST LEAVE.” Must be the hotel California.

“Last thing I remember, I was
Running for the door
I had to find the passage back to the place I was before
‘Relax’ said the night man,
‘We are programmed to receive.
You can check out any time you like,
But you can never leave!'”

There’s too many things in this next work of art that rattle me to the core for me to even begin explaining…

He’s just pissed he’s been stored in a box surrounded on all sides by honky music.

I legitimately thought these were artful renditions of the TARDIS at first…

Another small dead child.

I’m being alerted I haven’t offended enough Asian people in this post soooo…

Look! A jaundiced pig! Who’s up to something.

Anyone remember being read Babushka’s Doll as a child? Also, you know what, my fears of dolls is starting to really make sense now.

Butt nuggets Cookies!!

He’s seen too much.

Uhmmm…. that’s not where salt comes from….

This bitch is too classy for this joint.

What’s that? I also haven’t offended enough black people? OK, we’ll just see what this doll has to say about that!

The only two realistic looking black dolls ARE NOT AMUSED by that last joke. In fact they’re not amused by anything. Whose idea was it to make a series of depressed children’s dolls anyway?

Paradise Lost? “WAKE UP EVE! FOR THE LOVE OF GOD WAKE UP!”

Did you know Native Americans are devils? Me either.

OK the Viking ship is kind of impressive… though I don’t think wooden sails sounds like such a great idea.

These two little gents got their portrait painted after they murdered the rest of their family and took a break to smoke a pipe. Seriously though, why is the little one smoking a pipe?! And are those really cemetery crosses?!

Ah, that’s better, a pony.

I found this cabinet, which I really liked, buuut I think it’s haunted. No reason, just a swirling feeling in my gut…

Just to be sure I opened it to let the ghosts out.

Remember when I said the first thing I saw was a giant cock? Well, the last thing I saw leaving was two giant cocks. Hope you enjoyed my little jaunt, until next time!


AquaCorals – Fairfield Maine

I don’t think there’s anyone reading this blog that has done so since the very beginning, back when it was called Chasing Marbles, not Catching Marbles, but if you have you’d know that one of the very first stops I took before going cross country was a little salt water shop in Fairfield Maine called AquaCorals. I was so new to blogging I didn’t even have a camera! So I decided to go back and see what my macro lens could do and see how it was going.

Also I brought some friends, who wanted to come along and see what the hell I was talking about…. trained fish…. We were warmly welcomed and my crew got quite an education! From filtration, to healthy bacteria, to end of life fish care, the shop owner was happy to share. She also let us see her trained fish do a couple tricks, swooshing from side of the tank to the other and twirling on command. I smiled. One of the trained fish was a Yellow Tang, much like the one who died on me a few years ago and took piece of my heart with him. RIP Mr. Yellow. It was a very lovely trip down memory lane, back to when I was into all this stuff. Now I came only with a camera and a smile but you know what? It was super relaxing and a wonderful way to spend an otherwise unbearably hot afternoon. I even made peace with an old enemy – the starfish. Starfish really freak me out but the feather star I found there was actually pretty charming!

I went through the whole shop, which for Maine is quite extensive. She had some very beautiful corals, all super healthy, and the fish were bright and rambunctious as well. Sadly the fish didn’t like my camera much and hid and the corals were lit with a lighting my camera wasn’t used to so most of the photos came out crazy blurry. Moral of the story? I’m a shitty photographer. Just kidding, the moral of the story is I should really go back and try again with a regular lens… or read the manual and figure out what I am doing wrong…. but who does that?

After taking as many photos as my heart desired I returned to gaze upon some very vibrant zooanthids and talked for a while longer. I asked if she had any mantis shrimp knocking about which is a bit like going to a sheep farm and asking where the wolves are at but I can’t help what my heart desires! And I do love mantis shrimp! Despite the fact they are bloodthirsty fish-killing, thumb-splitting, demons predatory accidental stowaways. Today I was out of luck but that’s OK! By now it was time to amble out of the shop anyway. If anyone in Maine is reading this and wishes to get into salt water fish or corals I strongly suggest your first stop should be here. And if you’re already established? Also still go. There’s nothing to be disappointed by here! (Except my mediocre photography.) And if you want to make a day of it you can follow my route today and wander down the street where there’s an enormous antique store… Lots of fun for all.

 


Simple Graces – Antiques & More – Dexter Maine

Coming back from the Steampunk Festival I passed by this huge antique place and decided when in Rome…

Immediately upon walking in I was greeted by two stuffed bears. I squealed with glee and was caught by the shopkeep, an enthusiastic teenage boy, who I immediately roped into my madness by asking to take photos of the bear… After I got him laughing sufficiently hard enough I was able to remove the bear’s price tag and take a very realistic looking photo. WIN.

Actually the whole place was a win. It was a HUGE farmhouse with all sorts of winding rooms, each crammed with all sorts of goodies. I got lost in a giant collection of vinyls, having lost my own collection I couldn’t really resist starting a new one for $1 a record. I mean really, a dollar. And they weren’t bad records! Usually these antique stores just have piles of Christmas music and Christian gospel and things people wouldn’t actually admit to owning… This collection lacked a lot of popular rock like back home but had a lovely variety of 60’s folk. No Phil Ochs though. Still looking for that! But hey! If you’re in the area and really really love Neil Sedaka go here! There’s like 50 Neil Sedaka records here smattered throughout. No idea who could have liked him that much but hey! To each their quirky own! $10 later I ended up with some Billy Joel, Byrds, Kinks, Joan Baez, Barry McGuire (Eve of Destruction!), and the Kingsmen (Louie Louie!!)

It was a lovely detour. And of course no antique store would complete without a soul sucking doll and some snazzy furniture. All reasonably priced. I think the doll only cost one soul.


 

House by the Side of the Road Plant Nursery – Wilton NH

Today was such a gorgeous day that I felt like spending a bit of it haplessly wandering. I had decided to go in the direction of a covered bridge and see if there was anything else interesting along the way. The other thing interesting turned out to be an enormous plant nursery I have passed many times but have never stopped at. I had no idea the green house son the property sprawled in all directions and allowed for such a phenomenal selection of bright healthy happy plants! As usual I took the time to add to my stock photo collection by taking my macro lens after the flowers. The attendant wasn’t sure of my mischief and watched me for a good long while – I smiled but this only seemed to make him watch me a little less conspicuously. I probably should have said something, that I am not here casing the joint, but you know it was hot and my tongue was tied in a knot… Other than that what wonderful flowers!


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