Delaney Antiques [Clocks] – West Townsend Massachusetts

After going to the Hobart Antique Mall we realized that directly across from it there was another sign reading Antiques across the road. We decided to explore this further having no idea what it was. The sign out front seemed even older and more worn out than the Hobart Village Antiques but there was cars in the lot so we held on for the ride. The entrance was a little weird but we found it and then walked into one of the bizzarest places we’ve been yet. Suddenly we were surrounded on all sides by antique clocks, all ticking. At the risk of dating myself I felt like I was walking into a scene from Hook but unlike the kid in that movie I didn’t have a baseball bat and a bad influence instead I had an immediate panic attack. Ticking is one of my triggers that brings me right back to grade school when some teacher thought it was a great idea to teach children math through timed tests. So we all sat with our multiplication tables and and who got to sit next to the loudly ticking egg timer? You guessed it! Me! I never did learn my multiplication tables and to this day I find timed tests to be child torture. Recently I’ve gone back to learn my math with DuoLingo and was more than horrified to find part of its lessons are again, timed tests. No ticking but still as anxiety inducing.

I swallowed hard and walked in anyway knowing I was being neurotic, these are grandfather clocks, not Acme bombs, and no one’s asking me math questions. Just put on your big kid pants and deal with it.

This place was a two level post and beam barn filled in every corner with grandfather clocks against every wall and in the middle of the room? Tables with smaller mantle clocks. All in pristine condition, all ticking, all reading a different time! So now not only was I sweating hard from panic I was also struggling not to twitch from the chaos of none of them being set right. This is an autistic person’s nightmare, honestly, so much so I noticed I wasn’t taking any photos of individual clocks so I closed my eyes, breathed a moment, and allowed my instinct to drag me to the most interesting looking clock. It had an elaborate wood inlay pattern, the likes I’d never seen before. I took a moment to take a picture of that before walking up the stairs which was decorated with clock faces, so many clock faces.

By the time we made it to the second floor my companion was quietly talking. These clocks are neat but expensive he lamented. He looked at the price tag on one which was over a grand. I blinked, happy to be focusing on something other than the ticking, and said well yeah, the one you picked has a mahogany inlay. By now the shop keep had come up and started talking to us. Ask any questions, he welcomed. So my companion asked about Newport Rhode Island and apparently back in the day they had a few famous clock makers and he pointed out those clocks as we riffed about what an odd place colonial Newport was. One of these clocks was made of solid walnut, I nodded and said, “When we still had walnut trees” which seemed to delight the shop keep who confirmed the sentiment. Black walnut still exist in the United States but are near extinct due to diseases and pests that thrived in the pine forests we planted after cutting down every old forest hardwood tree that existed here. There are conservation efforts going on right now to grow more and the public can help. This is one of the reasons I want to own land – to be a custodian of some of these precious trees, grown from nuts acquired through these programs.

We also got to see a reproduction piece of furniture from the John Brown house that was the most expensive piece of American furniture to be sold at auction. It was indeed beautiful.

I asked what the oldest clock was and he showed us a grandfather clock built in 1610. It was English and spent most of its life in England and France. Strangely enough it was the one clock I took a singular photo of with the ornate wood inlays. I’d been drawn to it for a reason!

We thanked the owner for the history lesson and said we’d refer anyone looking for an antique clock here! Hell, if we ever end up with the old farm house of my dreams I’m not guaranteeing that won’t be us someday. You know if this blog ever goes viral and we end up with clock money!

Hobart Village Mall Antiques – West Townsend Massachusetts

This week it was time to amble around a few places a little closer to home than usual. I had no idea this one even existed but it sounded promising, I mean when you put village and mall in the title it implies something of decent size. It closed at 5PM though so we went to this one first after waking from a stress-induced coma. This would be the perfect little outing to take our minds off of *vaguely gestures at everything.*

When we got there the sign was very beaten and battered, clearly well aged, and almost covered by a mud-spattered snowbank. Tis the season! The parking lot was confusing and seemed to go right past someone’s driveway. And the building? Just as decrepit looking as their sign. I muttered, “We’re about to be serial killed, aren’t we?” To which my companion tried to lighten the mood by pointing out we weren’t the only car there. THANK GOD.

I was expecting the worse. Really, like another Cookie’s. But low and behold as we walked in the change in scenery was stark! Inside the rooms were well lit, perfectly painted, and all sorts of well thought out displays. Lots of room for each object to really shine and mixed among them all were these “replica” furniture made from what I can only assume was local trees and branches. You know, perfect if you’re going for that rustic look.

I didn’t even look at the price tags on this place because everything looked so clean and proper I knew it’d be out of my budget. And the things we found were very unique! One was a cast iron horse from a child-size carousel made in the 1920’s. It had lost all its coloration over the years and looked just as desperate and wanting as the old cast iron pans you see everywhere. But if you were looking for carousels of better quality there was a whole room of them! We also found a gorgeous French bronze clock depicting a naked Promethius in chains, I guess being punished for that whole giving fire to humanity scandal, a series of French posters, a series of signed prints from artists I wasn’t familiar with, some old probably haunted portraits, the customary smattering of possessed dolls, and a Victrola with a wooden horn! I’ve seen lots of phonographs in my day, some with horns, but never wooden. MY GOODNESS.

We left without buying anything but hey, if you’re in the area and happen to be monied and love purchasing some very unique antiques this place is well worth a little lookie-loo.

Fab Finds – Foxboro Massachusetts

On yet another jaunt into the great blue yonder we happened by Fab Finds listed as an antique store. Though quaint and charming I wouldn’t have personally categorized it as such. It was more a country decore kinda of place with well arranged displays highlighting a number of quirky babbles, folk art, wall hangings, and a smattering of furniture. The place had a deffinate vibe. Think country chic meets grandma core with a few degrees of fairly moneyed queer kitch. Lots of bedazzled things, lots of little ponderous objects that seemed their own statements of confused wonder. I took a photo of a cherub head looking ominously from the center of the room. One of my companions took a close up photo of the same cherub and it looked… innocent. It was a fun and spontaneous game of Perspective!

Would I suggest this place? If you happen to be in or near Foxboro and this is the vibe of your abode sure! Check it out. Otherwise maybe not. It was VERY niche.

Puggy’s Keene New Hampshire

Keene is such a cute little hippie college town that I love to visit and see what else I can find. Puggy’s has been on my list for a while but every time I try to find it something distracts my attention. Well not this time!

It’s listed as an antique store but that’s not really the feel I got when I walked in. I mean sure, I was immediately greeted by an absolutely delicious collection of classic 1960’s rock vinyls but beyond that this store was more a hippie shop. It had Greatful Dead tee shirts, a corner for cool shiny rocks, a bunch of fidget toys, and yes some retro toys and another room full of more antique-y things which for the most part were joyfully bizarre. This seemed like a little bit of everything and it was run by an adorable old hippie woman who clearly knew everyone on a first name basis. An unlikely cornerstone of the community which makes me so happy to see as I feel in the American landscape these gathering places are increasingly rare.

So if you live in Keene or nearby deffinately check this place out. Also check it out if you’re into classic rock vinyls because there were four separate vendors specializing in this and they had a delightful assortment. Bowie, T-rex, Deep Purple, local legend Country Joe and the Fish. I could drop SO MUCH money here buying vinyls!

The Bargain Corner – Swanzey New Hampshire

I thought there were more buildings on the property when I was checking out Fairground Antique Market so I drove around the weird dirt parking lot until I found two more antique stores. One was closed on that day but this one was open so I checked it out.

The front of the building had very worn signs so I guess this place is older than the hills. I walked in and was pleasantly surprised. It was a large building with careful displays and lots of walking space. The antiques were mostly modern and were mixed with junk shop items like a library full of DVDs. There wasn’t a lot here but what was here was very decently priced! In the back there seemed to be a second whole building filled with very well preserved furniture for jaw droppingly cheap prices. Most were hovering around $250. I’m talking hutches, display cabinets, dressers, wardrobes, an ice chest, writer’s desks, really anything you’d find in an old farmhouse and some were quite unique like the wardrobe with huge Gothic arches and the very niche bread baker’s cabinet which had a flour dispenser, a kneading table, and other cool bread making features. Two carousel horses and a bunch of smaller items were scattered about as well.

I would deffinately suggest this place to anyone looking for real wood furniture for extremely affordable prices. This place made me wish I had a house to furnish!

Fairground Antique Market – Swanzey New Hampshire

I have driven by this antique mall hundreds, if not thousands, of times as I travel to Keene for various errands but I never stopped in because the outside of the place looks confusing and uninviting. These days this doesn’t bother me, I’ll still poke around, buy in previous years I wasn’t so adventurous. This time around I decided it was time and drove into their dirt parking lot that promised antiques through various signs. I parked near a door I thought was the entrance but alas it wasn’t and I had to hop and skip around a number of icy puddles around the building to get into the correct door. I wasn’t expecting much but this place turned out to be huge and filled to the brim with all sorts of neat things.

There were a few probably haunted dolls, oodles of absolutely bizarre knick knacks, a delightful smattering of cast iron, a herd of Breyer horses (appaloosas to be exact,) two black Raggedy Anne dolls, a depressed Gothic Raggedy Anne doll, a series of old toasters that looked like they’d work better as inciniary devices, and some fun vintage hats and clothes including a lacy Victorian child’s nightie that looked fit to be buried in. You know, ghost clothes.

This store also did well what it didn’t have – no N@zi bullshit, not a single item I could find, no “Chinamen” type bricabracs, no weird Native American stuff clearly made by white people, and no mammies! Hell, I only found one racist doll that looked like a Yeti doing a minstrel. At least he had character.

Every time I go to a place like this I tell myself I need to educate myself on what’s actually valuable so I can start a career in picking. I sometimes flip through cases of old vinyl records hoping to find gold but this place oddly didn’t have many vinyls. And my phone had no internet or reception in the building so I couldn’t even look it up if I found something. I was however really drawn to this particular cast iron cauldron I found. It was $125 and I couldn’t really justify spending that much but boy it was weird and beautiful. After I got home I looked it up and found out it was an early piece from Fall River Massachussetts, produced at a mill that burned down in the 1920’s after nearly a century of production. There was a mint condition one selling on ebay for seven and a half grand. WHAT?! I didn’t even know cast iron could have that kind of value! I mean this one wasn’t in mint condition as it was clearly used and loved with chips along the rim but there’s a huge gap between $125 and $7,500+! So I went back the next day and bought it. And while I was looking through this place again I found a cast iron ladle in another booth and they looked so fetching together it came home with me too. I guess I’m probably an honorary witch now.

The cashier was sweet and asked if I had an old house to put my new purchase in. I smiled broadly and said, “Not yet!” But I do have a terrible fondness for houses from the 1700’s, especially shakerbox style, and if it still has a fireplace this cauldron would be a hell of a showpiece to put in it. She warned me such places are money pits, she knows because she owns one, and I laughed. I know, but it’s worth the ghosts that probably haunt them. I know these days my daydreaming might seem a bit childish when the world feels like it is collapsing around me, but it’s these moments that make life worth living and memories of these moments no one can take away.

Anyway… If you’re looking for a large place to pick through and maybe find your own treasures check it out! It’s not only large but there’s two other antique stores across the parking lot. Make a day of it and be happy.

Antiques Market – Bangor Maine

After a long day we wanted to come back to Bangor and find something to eat but after parking we decided we were close enough to this antique store to brave the negative degree winds and check out one more place. This was surprisingly large for being directly in the city but I guess Bangor isn’t that big of a city compared to others in New England where rent prices might be outrageous. As such it was easy to get to by foot and despite having an entrance that didn’t look spectacularly large it was two full floors of stuff!

The first floor looked like any Main Street antique store – just lots of stuff in cases and likely for higher price tags. There were coins, books, jewelry, and of course salt and pepper shakers which are a must! One of the walls had what really looked like a haunted photograph of a 1920’s or 30’s child star, though I couldn’t place the name. I also enjoyed finding a manual to oral birth control from the 60’s. What you should know about taking the new pill! Do tell me.

The basement was where the cheaper and weirder antiques were that were more our style. Bizarre squirrel taxidermy, retro Halloween decorations, TONS of paintings depicting pioneers fighting bears for some reason, old political cartoons, a few lovable cookie jars, and of course a haunted doll or two. This was a fun little jaunt to end the day, worth it if you’re already walking through Bangor and seeing the sights.

Two Old Goats Antiques – Trenton Maine

Two Old Goats Antiques was the second to last antique store we decided to visit and funny enough I don’t think we’d been there before even with a catchy business name!

The first thing I noticed walking in was a wooden whale on the wall that freakishly looked like it had human teeth (on closer inspection they were rocks but this somehow didn’t make it any less distressing to look at.) The second thing I noticed was the cutest goddamn pit mix wandering around greeting people and what a good pup she was! I did not steal her. I may have wanted to.

This shop was on the smaller side but the things in it were sufficiently weird to make me smile especially in their unheated garage section where I found a box of lawn darts on the floor. I’ve heard of lawn darts and how dangerous they were but I’d never seen them and was absolutely horrified to learn they weren’t the size of regular darts. These suckers were the size of soup cans and just as heavy with a goddamn spear on the end. No wonder they were taken off the market! How many jugulars did these flying death pokers hit?!

Other fun finds included a three-foot-tall soulless Easter Bunny with nothing but gaping black voids for eyes. The tag literally read, “Buy if you dare.” And I can appreciate the humor in that! I really liked this one painting of two weird carousel horses for 35 bucks, but I couldn’t justify buying it. I don’t have a wall to put it on but someday, should I ever gnaw my way out of Dickensian poverty I shall have the most glorious and bizarrely decorated house that ever existed, displaying all sorts of uncomfortable treasures from my trips to antique stores – deathly looking portraits of Victorian children, an iron piggy bank displaying a dentist ripping out the tooth of a small child, a row of haunted ventriloquist dummies, and the kind of folk art that will make you wonder if I bought it from a mental institution. Promises, promises!

Hancock Creamery and Antique Mall

I’ve been to the Hancock Creamery before but for some reason it never got posted?? Which is weird because that day we walked in and all I ended up buying was this awesome book of creepy photos and poems that one of the workers there wrote. It was called Sea Witch; Photographs, Poems and Forget Me Nots from a Mainer Growing Up. I should have had her sign it… as it absolutely delightful! The photography was whimsically dark, the poetry vulnerable, and it’s by a local author! What’s not to love?(Though for legal reasons I have to tell you if you buy it from the link above I will receive a small commission. I’m trying something new with this Amazon Associate experiment.)

This time around there wasn’t a stack of books at the door but instead we were greeted by an old man offering us fudge. Apparently, every Friday is fudge day. It was delightful fudge! And the antique store didn’t disappoint, just rows and rows and isles of some of the strangest damn things – everything from lobster shakers to a two-foot-tall chocolate Easter bunny mold to a decapitated ceramic clown head. Everyone needs one of those. And it was for the most part all different stuff than the last time. This has definitely been added to our list of continued haunts!

Town Line Antique Center – Vassalboro Maine

It’s that time of year! Our few days of Maine vacation! And this was the first antique store that popped up on our radar. It was not disappointing – an expansive mall that seemed to go on for miles getting increasingly unhinged. Very Stephen King-like.

So many dolls! And they all looked so joyous to be probably haunted. Also an old ESP test card kit met us practically at the door. This place was going to be weird… and it was! The bric-a-bracs were just…. baffling. Clowns having tea, a fully dressed anthropomorphic elephant with a top hat, a “barber” holding his razor to some poor Joe’s throat?? WEIRD. Very weird. The kind of weird you shouldn’t look at for two long in case you become part of the display in the case. *Twilight Zone music plays*

There were also a few booths from local artists, a nice stockpile or uranium glass, an inordinate number of weird books, some distressingly well-done taxidermy, and some Christmas decorations that could have put Liberace to shame. HOLY GLITTER.

This place was definitely worth the drive. It was large and had something for everyone – even the all-out freaks. What’s not to love about that?

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