Wiscasset Antiques Mall – Wiscasset Maine

This was another big one that took quite some time to get through. When we walked in my attention immediately gravitated towards a little plastic encased booklet reading, “Little Known Facts About Bundling in the New World.” For those of you that don’t know in the early days of our country it was customary to only have one giant bed per family, especially in the winter when body heat was a good resource to have! Men and boys slept to one side, women and girls slept on another, and directly in the middle would be a bundling board – or a little wooden fence-like thing keeping the two groups seperate. Interestingly enough courting teenage couples were allowed to sleep in the same bed in these days, in the very middle, with the bundling board in between them and their parents right behind them. I’m sure that wasn’t weird at all. Also how were babies made with this arrangement?! There seemed to be an awfully lot of them…

ANYWAY, now that I am past that disturbing little distraction I will go back to telling you about the antique store. It was another Byzantine place with all sorts of nooks and corners, a ton of vendors, and just about something for everyone. I was particularly intrigued by a series of old newspapers saved detailing big events – Elvis Presley’s Death, the assassination of Kennedy, and the Son of Sam trial. And wow, so many puppets! All of different kinds! And the weird books… I could have dropped a lot of money on weird books but I was running low at this point. They even had one with absolutely horrible misogynistic boomer humor that was beyond cringe. Even more alarming they had an official notary press for sale…. and it worked… I’m sure no ne’er-do-well will find it and use it for anything mischievous…

All and all this place was large enough yo recommend travel to pick through or if you happen to be in the area its definitely worth a visit!

Route 1A Relics – Ellsworth Maine

Sometimes you find the best things while trying to go somewhere else. I remember when I was growing up the adults were always sooo frustrated when the kids would go completely off the rails and stop paying attention to whatever it was, they were supposed to be paying attention to, but I surmise this are the best bits of life.

I’m an adult now with flagrantly untreated ADD so not much has changed. My need for novelty and complete lack of planning are still fierce. So, it’s not surprising to know that on the way to Acadia State Park I passed by this absolutely chaotic antique store and HAD to stop. I am so glad we did!

This place was… mental. Outside a clutter of rural relics adorned the front, skeletons danced in the upstairs windows, and a giant lobster guarded a bus that looked like it’d been turned into a little cafe. Maybe that’s for the summer, I don’t know, I usually show up to these things off-season when everything looks abandoned and apocalyptic. But the store itself was still buzzing. People were shopping, there were two cashiers, life was good.

I found a bin of driftwood out front and rummaged through it as each piece was $5, a fraction of what driftwood back home costed, and I thought my aquarium fish deserved a nice addition to their decor. Inside the place looked even more like a barn than the outside with exposed beams and wood floors. I loved the atmosphere already, but it took a decidedly even more lovable turn the more we ventured inside. There were a number of vendors here who clearly had an eccentric sense of humor, or at least an unconventional decorating style. One corner drew me to it with its large arched window and posters plastered randomly in all directions all over the aforementioned arch. That vendor was selling action figures and animal bones. Because those two things are very complimentary. Just across from this was a huge assortment of brand-new books, the remnants of a failed bookstore I’m guessing. I picked up a really unique looking volume on New England folklore here and begrudgingly paid almost full price. It just was too damn interesting to leave.

In another room we found a life size Spiderman, tangled in webs on the ceiling, looking like he was about to be devoured by a black widow. I’m no expert on comics but I’m not sure that’s how that story goes… Aquaman was also on the ceiling, as I’m sure he’s accustomed, riding the top of a hanging canoe. And if that wasn’t alarming enough clowns started to appear, a life size It and a life-size Batman in a distressingly seductive pose neither of us could figure out. It wasn’t even the sexy revisionist Batman of the 80’s to present, it was the classic cartoonish version.

I was also delighted to see a whole booth of weird fish pottery. You cannot beat the absolute strangeness of local artists. All this wonderful ambiance seemed to be the heart of this adventure. It’s almost as if I’ve forgotten to mention the antiques! There were a number of them in this shop, and as is custom they ranged in price with the most affordable in the basement and the most insanely priced on the top floor. Really a nice assortment of everything small and quirky.

My companion left that day with an old Zippo lighter. It was shiny, and contains fire, so I could see the appeal. We both bought some bomb mittens that according to the cashier a sweet old lady had made from old sweaters. I have used them since, and they are really warm!! Highly recommended if you need a pair!

Annnnywaaay, if you happen to need a little whimsy in your life or like antiquing for small objects this is really where it’s at, and it’s near a lot of touristy things too if you come in the summer.

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