Tag: Food

Kellie’s Cafe- Newport Rhode Island

This is going to sound absolutely bonkers but a few winters ago I was driving at night past Kellie’s Cafe and I saw a velociraptor in the parking lot. A fucking life-size dinosaur was just chilling there on a trailer at 3am. Now, I know from previous instances in my life that it’s best not to ask questions buuuut the next morning the damn velociraptor was gone and I was left wondering what glitch in the matrix I’d just witnessed. I made note of which parking lot it was and kept this story to my damn self until over a year later my companion excitedly explained there was a life-size bronze velociraptor living in the yard at Aardvark Antiques just down the road. I KNEW IT!! I DID SEE A DINOSAUR!

What does this have to do with the little British cafe whose parking lot was once infested with prehistoric beasts? Not much. I doubt they had any idea. But seeing as I now knew about this place why not check it out? I like British things… especially Doctor Who. Fucking love Doctor Who. This place had a big old Britishly colored teapot as it’s sign outside so this seemed like good indication it’d be interesting…

Inside the cafe was absolutely tiny with only a few tables. Two servicemen and a single English dude were the only customers here on this particular day. We made our way in quietly and sat down while looking at the back wall which had a HUGE teacup display behind a life size cut out of the queen. I mean I get it, I know y’all have a king now but he has the charisma of a frozen cod fish soooo… I’ll accept this weird tribute to the former queen. My English friend tells me this is customary and everyone has one to mutter loyalties to once a day. Pretty sure he’s fucking with me there.

ANYWAY… we were tended to by a sweet lady whose accent sounded American for a few sentences and then not so much. Cracked me up. I love British accents. She offered us tea with our breakfast and I accepted. My companion stuck to coffee. We looked over the menu and realized there was fun options here to play with. A Full English Breakfast was one. My companion took that. I on the other hand I was morbidly curious about the Scotch Egg. I’d seen one being eaten on Broadchurch and heard people talking about them several times since but my grasp of what it actually was was…. poor. One way to find out! Our hostess seemed delighted I wanted to try one and she asked if my companion would like the blood pudding with his English breakfast at which point I think his brain shuttered. He struggled to answer for a moment but then said no. I on the other hand would have said yes to the iron-addled hockey puck I assume to be blood pudding. You only live once after all. And “you have to have blood pudding” says the guy who claims everyone has a cardboard cutout of the queen. (I know this entire blog entry screams unreliable narrator but I swear to god…)

My companion was very happy with his full English breakfast which he found to be very filling. I stole some of his beans which I remarked were tomato-y because British baked beans are different than Boston baked beans which rely on molasses. Still, they tasted good and I think our odd conversation was being listened to by everyone else here, especially when I received the Scottish egg and set about dissecting it for science. Mind you, it was egg-shaped and I supposed an actual egg, but that says very little doesn’t it? I cut it in half with a knife I stole from my companion (as my tomato sandwich did not require cutlery.) Inside was indeed a hard-boiled egg. On the outside it seemed to be some sort of sausage-filled batter, deep fried of course. It was filling! And I guess great for shoving in your pockets for later if you happen to work in a Victorian coal mine. I do not. And I’m not the biggest fan of sausage or hard-boiled eggs but that being said it wasn’t bad and I’m happy I tried it. I’m also happy I figured out how to use the odd plate and utensil that came with my tea. I hope the weird stick/spoon thing was to retrieve my tea bag because that’s what I used it for. I have to thank anyone who has ever called me “worldly” because I am 100% faking knowing anything. Please do not leave me unsupervised.

Finally, we ended our little meal and went to the counter which was apparently a danger zone because it was covered in English sweets. Chocolate covered digestives, Turkish delights, Jaffa cakes, numerous candy bars and the like. We took some home to keep on experimenting. I’ve never actually had a digestives with my tea… will it kick it up a notch? Guess we’ll see!

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Noodles – Northampton Massachusetts

So after our two days trekking through Vermont it was time to go back to Rhode Island but first there was an issue at hand – we needed something in our bellies. My companion was insistent on noodles but as much as I also could go for a steaming bowl of Ramon I knew Vermont was not going to have such faire. Noodle bars haven’t even really made it into rural areas, they’re basically just found in cities and some college towns at this moment in time.

My phone seemed to agree. There were no noodle bars showing up anywhere in Vermont but there was one vaguelly on the route home in Northampton Massachusetts which is both a city and a college town, hosting one of the US’s most esteemed all female universities – Smith’s University. We actually drove by the campus and I was hilariously caught off guard because I honestly had no idea what town it was in.

But anyway, we found a place to eat simply called Noodles. You know with a title that straight to the point you were going to get what’s advertised.

As usual it was a small space clearly run by immigrants gifting their delicious food to this country. It was FULL but they were nice enough to set up another spot to sit next to the bathroom. Interestingly the bathroom door had a note asking customers to use hand sanitizer before going into it.

The menu was fairly simple and allowed for a choice of several types of noodles or a plate of rice with the toppings of your choice. To my joy they had little peppers 🌶 next to the spicy items on the menu which means I didn’t have to ask! Woohoo!

I ordered some sort of seafood special served with udon noodles which I was trying for the first time. My companion picked a less adventurous option but both were delicious! Granted I had no idea udon have the same basic shape and feel as wet earth worms which… is really not my thing. But hey at least now I know! The sea food was nice though. We got to play “what is it?” With one particular item that was sliced up in a pretty grid pattern. I thought it was some sort of vegetable and popped the whole thing in my mouth. Oh no… not a vegetable. Chewy. Mildly fishy. I think it was probably squid. Today was not a great day for texture surprises! But I regained my composure and ate it. I actually do like calamari… just… not so much surprise calamari. All jokes aside it was piping hot and delicious with very large chunks of crab meat and mystery seafood. It was totally worth the five hours it took me to figure out chop sticks which I’m as bad at as parallel parking. Fortunately I’ve found going rogue and stabbing things with the aforementioned sticks usually suffice when fine motor skills are lacking. We both had literally a whole meal worth of noodles to bring home as leftovers. This was definitely worth the detour.

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Lindy’s Diner – Keene New Hampshire

You know whap happens when my usual travel companion has a week off? He gets kidnapped and dragged into the mountains! But first there was the matter of food. It’s rare I bring him back to mine and I wasn’t about to make the same mistake I made last time – eating breakfast at the place in town I knew was… not great.

We had planned to go to Vermont that morning anyway so why not stop just short of the border in Keene and get something delicious for breakfast? And if that didn’t work just give up and go to the candy or fudge shops just around the corner?

My companion picked a place and we parked and started walking towards it when he spotted Lindy’s, the cute little tin diner. I said I’d never heard anything bad about Lindy’s and it’s been there forever so we immediately made new plans. To Lindy’s!

It was a good choice. We ate there two mornings in a row, getting a good selection off their breakfast menu. The first morning I had strawberry stuffed waffles because I was having a sugar craving. It delivered on this! Waffles are generally supposed to taste like butter – because that’s basically all they are with just enough flour to keep a shape – but these 100% tasted like cake. Yellow cake to be exact. I was BUZZING. The next morning I behaved myself and had eggs and home fries with some rye toast. All simple but delicious traditional diner food. Couldn’t be happier. My companion was also happy with the hollandaise sauce, which to be fair he’s a bit fussy about. Twas sad to hear the other patrons saying this place was in the process of being sold, probably to be carted somewhere else. I adore tin diners but they never seem to last in the area.

This was a good choice to begin both our trips across state lines into Vermont.

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Blue Plate Diner – Newport Rhode Island

Since I spent my actual birthday with family I decided to spend a second day just living it up with BF and BFF. Such is the way I organize my double life in two states. ANYWAY, to start off the celebrations we went to an old haunt – the Blue Plate Diner, which I’m not sure I’ve mentioned on this blog before because we’ve been there so many times. That being said the staff is always friendly, the food is delicious, and this Nutella French Toast was the perfect sugary sweet way to start a whole day of not giving a fuck about anything!

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Next Door Burger Bar – Yarmouth Massachusetts

We had had such an eventful day poking at random things that food was in order and what better place to stop for lunch than an eccentric burger joint in a wedding cake house? The decor was just as delightfully whimsical when we walked in. In fact the first thing we saw were these ostrich fashionistas on the wall. We waited for quite a while wondering if there was a bell or something we’d failed to figure out when a waitress popped out of the back room and led us to a room at the side.

Everywhere there was weird art hanging on the wall getting weirder with every frame. We sat near the pickled mermaid, for instance. Now, I am not usually someone who eats burgers so this was going to be a bit of a test for me but so far I was at least enjoying the atmosphere. I ended up getting the sweet potato and quinoa burger, which again, was a first. My companions bought some sort of exotic sounding pork sandwich and a normal burger, with a side of sweet potato fries, though both showed interest in some sort of spicy burger that apparently sounded like an “ass blaster,” not my words but I’m appreciative of the humor. Usually there’s at least one person at the table that’s less than enthusiastic about their meal but this time around the food was amazing for everyone. I even passed a bite of mine around and had two carnivores admit it was good! I stole a sweet potato fry too and it was crispy and delicious. This place had a small menu but they knew what they were doing and they did it well! We were all so full after this.

On a side note the bathroom was its own adventure. It was still a normal Victorian bathroom with a big soaking tub, a shower that was clearly added later, and a pristinely clean toilet just looking pretty sitting there. It seemed a luxurious bathroom if I may say so myself.

We all left very full and very happy and I would highly recommend this place to anyone in the area or any foodies who want to travel!

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Transylvania Restaurant & Bar – New Haven Connecticut

The cemetery was a wonderful little place to explore but what tempted us to come to New Haven was a random restaurant review on FaceBook that just looked so intriguing we had to go check it out.

The Transylvania Restaurant and Bar is a Vlad the Impaler themed restaurant in a former grist mill. It has all the charm of an old historic building and all the joy of misplaced vampires! My whimsy meter was already on overload looking at the bathrooms, labelled bat rooms. This was my companion’s idea to come here. Initially I thought it might be kind of… too gimmicky… but I gave it a chance because their menu online screamed European peasant food and you know what I fucking love? That’s right, European peasant food. And I don’t mean to be at all offensive in saying that. I’ve on occasion tried the froufrou rich people food but nothing beats the dishes of the common man. Those dishes have to exist in a space of actually being good and I mean really fucking good.

We showed up a few minutes after they opened and were only one of two (or three?) parties there in the restaurant part, the other one was a large family with lots of exuberant kids. I think it may have been the owner of the restaurant who tended to us and asked how we ended up here. We told her a FaceBook ad and she excitedly exclaimed, in her adorable accent, that the other people here were also showing up because of the same FaceBook post and she asked if she could take our photo. Suuuuure….? We laughed. Funny enough I get asked by strangers for my picture weirdly often on these travels and I don’t mind smiling for the camera.

Anyway, once we settled in we were over the moon with the menu. It wasn’t an extensive menu but it was intense in its options. I could have chowed down on just appetizers and been just fine! But there was more, so much more. Prior to coming here we found a video of someone pulling apart one of their baked cheese wedges, to which my arteries screamed, “NOOO! DON’T DO IT!” Which is why I had no choice but to try it. It was fairly standard to what baked cheese usually is but they served it with slices of granny smith apple that TOOK IT TO THE NEXT LEVEL. I was going to take a photo but we devoured it in a few seconds long before I remembered to do so. We both felt like pigs after that but DAMN was that good!

I was enamored by their selection of soups and salads, including wild mushroom soup and tripe soup, but I had decided before I even came here that I wanted to try the goulash. I didn’t have a firm grasp of what goulash was but it’s such a fun word and sounds so very peasanty. Only problem was it was beef goulash which I’m really not supposed to be eating due to a mild allergy. I went for it anyway, probably much to my companion’s chagrin, as it’s usually his job to chase me around with bottles of water in a usually futile attempt to keep me alive. I went for it anyway and when they served it… it looked like a bowl of wet dog food with a blop of sour cream on the top. I’m not going to lie. But you know what’s great about peasant food? The uglier it is the tastier it usually is. This was no exception! HOLY CRAP was it good! So tender and moist and full of flavor!! With little chunks of potatoes floating in there. You can never go wrong with potatoes. My companion thought something was wrong but I was just making sure to chew really really really well (as to avoid getting it stuck in my throat which is what my mild allergy to beef does.) I was soooo full after the cheese and half a bowl of this goulash. Complete and utter food coma.

Meanwhile my companion had ordered the Hungarian Paprikash which turned out to be an equally flavorful chicken dish. I know because we swapped a few bites. I would have been happy ordering that too! And he ate the whole thing… which was a lot of food! That’s how you know it’s good. When a foodie with nothing to gain says so.

Honestly, I think we would have both really enjoyed trying their desserts, one of which included a flaming pile of impaled doughnuts which was so fitting, but we were both bursting at the seams. We promised to come back… and maybe someday we will. I usually don’t say this of restaurants, but it was worth the two-hour drive to get there. Highly recommend!

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Moody’s Diner – Waldoboro Maine

You know what’s a really great way to wrap up several vacation days of antiquing? Going to a well-known diner and just enjoying a good old fashioned food coma. This place had all the ambience you’d want from a tin diner, including regulars. And the price wasn’t bad for being so well known! I had a turkey salad sandwich with fries, and peanut butter pie for dessert, both I only remembered to take photos of after I ate them. I can’t remember what my companion ate, not because I’m an oblivious twat-waffle but because it’s been several weeks since we were at Moody’s and I only remembered what I ate because I had photos… if it helps I do remember he liked whatever he orders. Like really liked it. He also already knew about Moody’s from something, probably Diners, Drive-ins, and Dives.

BUT ANYWAY! You should absolutely stop in for a pie. Their food was delicious but Jesus Christ that pie…

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Pretzel and Pizza Creations – Frederick Maryland

Ever just wander in some place with heavy college vibes and look around nodding, “This makes no sense but I love it.” That was what Pretzel and Pizza Creations was. It was a tiny booth eatery that served not just pretzels and pizza but also ice cream and one “adult shake” because why not?? This place was the chaotic fever dream of tired tourists, stoned college kids, and the otherwise hungry.

I was talked into trying the ice cream… And it was great. Tasted like Nutella. Shame I was already full to the gills… Still, we sat for a while and enjoyed the place all the same. It’d been a long and happy trip. No one really wanted to leave.

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Wright’s Chicken Farm – Burrillville RI

We decided to eat dinner at Wright’s Chicken Farm after our adventures in the Douglas State Forest. It was not terribly far from where I used to live so I was once again surprised to learn about something I have never heard of – although maybe I shouldn’t be. By the time I moved into the area my narcissistic ex had gotten what he needed out of me and had long forgone the love-bombing process, instead coyly making sure I was isolated and car-free at home while he ignored me to pursue other romantic prospects behind my back. This included date nights and going out to eat so yeah… how was I to know there was a great chicken shack down the road?

I had been to Wright’s Dairy Farm already (they have AMAZING buttercream frosted cakes there.) Wright’s Chicken Farm however is in a different location and it is a large venue hall and restaurant that only serves one dinner so it’s great for anyone who has trouble picking something off a menu. Dinner consisted of baked chicken (both white and dark meat), pasta with tomato sauce, french fries, salad, and buns. All served family style so you could pick and chose whatever you pleased.

The ambiance of this place was… weird. I thought it looked like a hole in the wall casino, the kind you’d find out in the sticks somewhere. My companions thought it looked like the visitors/community room in a nursing home. Eventually we all agreed it had big bingo hall energy. The vast majority of the other people here were old, 100% of them were white, and they all looked respectable. Even I was a little uneasy – and I’m whiter than Wonder Bread! But not terribly respectable. Adding to the weird vibe it had a big gift shop attached with the most random of things in it – including but not limited to tacky glitter covered Christmas ornaments. They know their target audience. That being said they also had fudge and truffles in all flavors and that made up for a little bit of the oddness. As did our bombastic waiter whose rough NYC/Jersey Shore accent was woefully out of place and whose energy was just as loud. Made my brain itch a bit.

Anyway. The place was simple and cheap and had good food so I am not complaining in any way. I particularly liked the dark meat and french fries which I ate far too many of. They offered ice cream after this but YIKES who has room for ice cream after an all-you-can-eat styled meal?! Afterwards I hung out in the parking lot a little bit talking while waiting for the others. We noted how quaint the motel across the street looked and the duck pond in between. Eventually a complete stranger, a woman, came up to me and complemented my laugh out of nowhere. Well that’s a new one! But I’ll take it.

All and all it’s a decent enough place to go to if you happen to be in the area and have a craving for baked chicken and a family style meal.

*Image taken from Wright’s Farm website (sorry, I didn’t bring my camera in with me.)

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New Orleans

Good old New Orleans, how could I forget America’s home to Voodoo, ghost tours, beloved vampire writers, and Mardi Gras? I decided to start my little journey by heading towards the famous French Quarters, a magical place where diaper-wearing horses pull carts around the streets. No no, I ended up parking comfortably near the French Quarter for $14 and I walked around. I was in search of a skirt… you know one of those airy ankle-length ones that they apparently don’t sell in the South… and to be quite frank they don’t sell skirts period down here. Whhhy?! It’s so frickin’ hot you’d think everyone would be wearing them! I would settle for an ankle length sundress of course but all the ones here went to your knees and were made of hot materials. It made no sense. I weaved in out of Voodoo shops as a reward for sticking it out and trying to find a skirt, a abysmal activity if there ever were one. Skulls abounded.

I stopped wherever it looked interesting, or just air conditioned in the case of the Magaritaville, apparently a whole parrothead-inspired margarita-flinging bar. I only stayed in its stoop for a few minutes so I could go on. In the meantime mules and horses clacked by with their tourist carriages telling of pirates and voodoo priestesses. I passed by the Voodoo priestesses’ bar and her little voodoo shop. I may have gone in there if a bunch of locals weren’t in the stoop debating something.

After I walked around the main part of the French Quarters I meandered up to Bourbon Street for shits and giggles, figured it’d be interesting people watching if nothing else. That was interesting to say the least! The first thing I stumbled upon was a seedy cabaret with a barker out front. I looked him dead in the eye to see if he’d still make his pitch and laughed when at first hesitated but then actually did! I walked by, obviously. I had no idea the States even had cabarets. Seems such an odd thing to me, bet you they probably named it such to make it sound more interesting than it actually was. In any event I walked past a lot of little strip joints and whatnot, a great deal of them with cutesy little names like The Cat’s Meow. I passed by pubs, bars, and other liquor friendly little nooks, some reading, “two drink minimum,” which seemed more than a tad bit odd. Apparently there was no room for responsible drivers here.

It was a scalding hot day and I had to take time out to lather myself up with sun screen in a public courtyard. I was melting. I ended up back in the French Market scouring the area for a cold non-alcoholic drink when in the spirit of trying new things I also bought a praline. Good thing I only bought one… it was really rather sweet, to a fault. Will not be trying that again.

I had a lot of fun just wandering around. The streets weren’t that busy, the people were friendly, and there was a lemon piper playing classic jazz on sax down at the piers. Every time a dollar was donated this hilarious musician would holler, “Thanks big guy! Have a great day!” before going right back to the same note he left off on. I didn’t come by anyone with a thick New Orleans accent either, which was fortunate as that’s probably the only US accent even I can’t translate.

If you are enjoying Catching Marbles please consider adding a dollar or two to my limited gas money fund so I can continue going on adventures and sharing them with you! Thank you!


 

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